Advice to Women on Sports and Men

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Saturday December 01, 2012 · 8:58 AM PST

2012/12/01 · 08:58

I suppose this fits under the heading "Men are from Mars." While most husbands/boyfriends and their eyes are laser-pointed at a flatscreen during any football/basketball/baseball game, the look on a typical wife/girlfriend is that of one who has just opened the hood of her new car. It is a look of XUG, which is one click beyond another acronym. Here's what a caring woman needs to know.

First, a short cut. One of my favorite true stories is of a good friend/lawyer/banker, a brilliant woman who was forced to go to Soldier Field by her boss to entertain clients, and she knew-nothing-and-could-not-care-less about the violent game of football. Her partner, a very wise man, told her not to worry because she only needed to say four things, and she could say them over and over again. After anyone kicks the ball, always say, "Special teams always make the biggest difference." After either team scores, always say, "Defense wins games. No defense - no win." Any time there is a time out, even at the end of the half, always say, "Well, let's see if they make adjustments." Any time there is a yellow flag on the field, just mutter, "Are you kidding me?" I know you women are thinking, "Are you kidding me?" but honestly, I'm not. These four things work every time. I don't know if she won over her clients, but she has been working at the same bank for twenty years, so I assume the men were duly impressed. If you want to learn more and you believe everyone needs a little humor, follow me below the orange Nerf.

Flyfish100

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Friday April 13, 2012 · 7:19 AM PDT

2012/04/13 · 07:19

I think I've looked considered all of them, South Beach, Atkins, Forks over Knives, and even the Eat Nothing but Grass and Drink Nothing but Osmosiffied Water Until You Puke diet, and I think I've finally got things figured out. They all have good, convincing arguments about some of their recommended foods, but each of them leads me to feel a little dissatisfied, or more accurately ... hungry. With that reality in mind, follow me below the scrambled eggy thing as I now propose - ta daa- The Combination Diet.

Flyfish100

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Friday February 17, 2012 · 6:07 AM PST

2012/02/17 · 06:07

Post-partum blues are worse than regular blues because there isn't any twelve-bar guitar music for it. This problem began for my dear wife last summer when her favorite soap, All My Children, went off the air. It wasn't like a death in the family for her; it was like the whole family died. And the dog. And the kids' goldfish. The Easter Bunny. Actually, it was worse than the demise of the Easter bunny because the Easter bunny never really WAS, and for my wife, Erica Kane was. Enter Downton Abbey, season two, produced solely to lift my wife out of the PP blues for which there is no twelve-bar etc. If you are a fan of Downton Abbey, follow me below the Grantham filigree.

Flyfish100

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Friday March 11, 2011 · 7:52 AM PST

2011/03/11 · 07:52

Having been a teacher for 36 years, married to a teacher, and the father of two teachers, one in Wisconsin, the dire events in Wisconsin have me as frustrated and angry as most everyone else here. Now retired, I've been logging in five or more times a day to check Giles Goat Boy and Kodiak54, and I've been to Madison four times in the last two weeks. I knew that the eventual vote was expected, (although its timing and probable illegality were), and things will probably get worse until the Wisconsin Supreme Court election and recall votes. It occurred to me, though, that we also need to practice some principles that will stymie Republicans, and more importantly, win independents over. As much as I would like to play smash-mouth politics, I would rather change minds, win public opinion battles, and dominate elections. Here's how I think we win....

Poll

0 votes Show Results

0 votes Vote Now!

Let's Hold a Lottery

Flyfish100

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Wednesday December 08, 2010 · 12:57 PM PST

2010/12/08 · 12:57

I’ve been wondering for a while now why each Democratic “victory” leaves me feeling sour at best and angry at worst. Coming to this site used to be fun, exciting, energizing, and informative. Now it’s deflating, informative, provocative and depressing. To combat that feeling, I’m proposing a death watch. The winner will be the person who can predict correctly the day and hour a Republican leader will again halt all legislation because our only priority will be to cut the deficit by any means possible. We’re all sick at heart, and we know this is going to happen, so what the hell, let's get it over with and move on. (.org)

Poll

13 votes Show Results

When will the ruling Republicans call a halt to all legislation until cuts are made to reduce their deficit?

13 votes Vote Now!

When will the ruling Republicans call a halt to all legislation until cuts are made to reduce their deficit?

Today

2 votes

Tomorrow

1 vote

December 24

0 votes

January 1, 2011

1 vote

January 23, 2011

4 votes

April 15, 2011

0 votes

November 2012

1 vote

Pie Day

4 votes

My last conversation with a Republican.

Flyfish100

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Friday July 23, 2010 · 7:35 AM PDT

2010/07/23 · 07:35

Hey, Dick, thanks for sending me the email telling me all about Obama refusing to sign any congratulatory letters for Eagle Scouts and Gold Girl Scouts. I didn’t know about that one. That Snopes guy says it ain’t so, but you know how all the Snopeses lie. Anyway, you asked if I was still a liberal after all the travesties that have happened, so I figured I might as well jump the snark or whatever and tell you the whole plan right up front. You’ve been getting it piece by piece on Fox anyway, so what the hell, here’s the stuff we liberals are up to and I’m going to put it all in one place so it will make sense, you betcha’. Just read below.

Flyfish100

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Sunday October 11, 2009 · 7:23 AM PDT

2009/10/11 · 07:23

For a while now, I've been bothered by the same things as most of you on this site: the Republican personal attacks on anyone and anything Democratic, the lies, the media spin, the emails that are blatantly false when fact-checked, and the dogged refusal of our opponents to face facts, to consider the legitimacy of a differing view, or to have a respectful, open discussion of what is best for our country. After hearing about the latest outrage, the disgusting display of Glenn Beck punching an image of President Obama every time he reads something that he disagrees with, I finally realized what's going on. The Republicans apparently don't understand it, but the days of being the bully, wading into any crowd or issue to start swinging fists, and insisting on one's own demands with a swift kick in the shins for anyone who won't submit - those days are over.

With some foresight, it looks to me like the Nobel committee realized it and the Republicans can't or won't. There's a new game in town.

Poll

15 votes Show Results

What game are we in?

15 votes Vote Now!

What game are we in?

Basketball

2 votes

Boxing

1 vote

Hunt the Snipe

6 votes

Who can eat the most pie

6 votes

McCain's Navy

Flyfish100

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Friday May 23, 2008 · 2:21 PM PDT

2008/05/23 · 14:21

I sent this earlier as a comment, but it seems more appropriate today as a diary. McCain's belittling of Obama as a non-military man (and we know how well they have done in the White House in the last seven years) bothers me a lot. I don't doubt that McCain suffered terribly at the hands of the North Vietnamese before signing a "confession," but to attack Obama on this point is upsetting. The question is not about military service, at least it certainly wasn't when Bush was concerned according to most Republicans. The question is character. Who is the man we will vote for? I can answer that. Jump below.

Flyfish100

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Friday April 18, 2008 · 6:32 PM PDT

2008/04/18 · 18:32

Is it just me or has there lately been a shift in The Daily Show to help Hillary Clinton? Last week I was surprised that Jon Stewart ran the first "Dick of the Week" segment and named Barack Obama because his campaign workers offered concert tickets the same day Bill Clinton was speaking on campus. Okay.

Last night he aired a segment on the last debate in which he pilloried the ABC questioners for asking pointless, "gotcha" questions and pretended to be resentful because that was his domain, and then aired a moment of Obama at his worst while stumbling to answer one of the absurd questions on tax reform. Left unscathed was Hillary. Hmm.

I haven't noticed that he and his writers have actively promoted Hillary Clinton but if they continue to skewer only Obama and McCain, the effect would be the same. I understand that The Daily Show writers may find targets anywhere; they will never pass up a good laugh line, and that they don't pretend to be a balanced news show, and yet their satire most often has more truth in it than what I see on the networks or certainly Faux News. Jon Stewart is an influential voice with the young and if he continues to protect a fellow New Yorker while spoofing everyone else, I may stop laughing soon.

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Advice to Women on Sports and Men

The Combination Diet

Downton Abbey

How We Win

Let's Hold a Lottery

My last conversation with a Republican.

The New Game in Town

McCain's Navy

Jon and Hillary?