Teaching perspective taking to school aged children
Honestly, one of the things in life I’ve always hated most is being misunderstood. Though it is possible that a silver lining can emerge from a misunderstanding, usually, misunderstandings lead to misery, annoyance, animosity, friend-loss, or even missed opportunity. This is true no matter your age. As adults, we have the ability to stand back from awkward situations and take the perspective of the other side, and work towards reaching an understanding. And we coach our children to do the same. How many times have you heard yourself saying: “Imagine what she felt like, when the toy was taken away?” or “How would you feel, if someone grabbed a toy from you?”. As the words flow from your lips though, do you also find yourself questioning whether the child actually hears you, or even understands what you are asking of them? From the looks on my child’s face when she was 3 and even 4 years of age, I suspect that in the heat of the moment she didn’t get it. At five, I am seeing some glimmerings, but still not always in the heat of the moment. It’s usually after the fact, when we talk later.
The question on my mind, along these lines, is whether there are effective ways to teach young children to engage in perspective taking, to help them find that silver lining in heated moments of interpersonal awkwardness.
Read More