Skip to main content

View Diary: Mitt Romney to mothers: Want dignity? 'You need to go to work' (237 comments)

Comment Preferences

  •  When I was pregnant with my daughter... (19+ / 0-)

    I made the mistake of going to an online parenting forum and asking for advice from stay at home moms- and I happened to mention that I had planned on staying home with my daughter for about 6 months, and would be on welfare since I didn't get paid maternity leave (and would be a single parent)

    They attacked me like a group of crazed hyenas. Told me I was abusing the system, I was lazy, I was a disgrace and why should THEIR tax dollars have to raise MY fucking kid.

    The same women who crowed about how motherhood was such a tough job, and complained that they didn't get enough respect apparently looked at it quite differently in a situation like mine. Just like you said Kalli- I was lazy because I was poor. They were deserving of respect and honor for staying home with their children because they were rich (or at least financially secure enough to live off of their husbands income) It boggled my mind.

    It was a pie in the sky fantasy anyways...welfare isn't enough to live off of, and I had to go back to work when she was 6 weeks old. But I'll never forget the way I was treated there.

    The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
    Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

    by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 02:00:25 PM PDT

    •  Assholes. I hate everybody. (10+ / 0-)

      Except you.

      And other people here.

      Present company excepted.

    •  That's it in a nutshell. (14+ / 0-)

      Romney et al. think the difference between Ann and you is that Ann did it the "right" way, by choosing to marry a rich guy. You, dumb lazy welfare queen, did it the wrong way by not marrying a rich guy. Therefore, your choice—the same exact choice Ann made—is still wrong.

      Now piss in this cup so we can decide if your kids deserve to eat.

      •  Yes, I quickly learned the rules (20+ / 0-)

        of being a welfare queen.

        Do not go grocery shopping with your EBT card (food stamps) wearing nice clothes, even if you bought them at the thrift store.

        Do not under any circumstances buy anything name brand or organic, even if it is on sale and cheaper than the alternative, with your EBT card. And for the love of god, NO STEAK.

        Do not allow your well dressed upper middle class mother to go grocery shopping for you, using your EBT card, even if you are sick because she will be harassed and accused of welfare fraud.

        If you use WIC checks, be prepared to be the most hated person in the store, and be prepared to go back at least 3 times before you can find the right kind of cheese.

        There are many rules for welfare moms. Thank goodness they have people like Mitt Romney to offer up such wonderful advice and guidance! I wish he was around when I was on welfare, it would have changed everything. I'm just a little confused though, because I actually DID work when I was on welfare, but I still didn't get treated with dignity...hmmmm....

        The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
        Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

        by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 02:29:21 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

      •  Outstanding hyperbole..anything to reject (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        2thanks

        the President and his views.  What part of leave the spouses out of this are you incapable of understanding?  

        Kill the children.   Really?  No, really?

        Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

        by EdMass on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 02:39:13 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Umwhat? (12+ / 0-)

          Having actually been a welfare mom, I can assure you that is not hyperbole. That is how they think, and that is exactly how you are treated and viewed by a large segment of the population. I have no doubt that Romney is one of them-I can see it written across his face every time he talks about the poor. I've seen it enough times in my personal life to recognize it immediately.

          Seriously, walk a mile.

          The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
          Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

          by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 02:51:40 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

        •  BTW, they don't want to KILL your children (8+ / 0-)

          they just want you to give them up for adoption or relinquish your parental rights if you are unable to afford their care on your own. And if you don't, they tell you that you are selfish and a bad mother.

          If you aren't willing to give your kid away, then they want the right to take the fluids from your body to make sure there are no drugs, inspect your home to make sure there are no modern appliances, and inspect your person to make sure you aren't using any of that welfare money to take care of yourself. They want to dictate what foods you can buy, what clothes you and you can wear, what you are allowed to do with your free time (if you should even have any to begin with) and above all else they want to sterilize you.

          Really.

          The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
          Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

          by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 03:00:00 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  *Correction should say "you and your child" (3+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            elwior, 2thanks, blueoasis

            not you and you.

            The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
            Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

            by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 03:02:29 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  Wow (1+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              2thanks

              First off, I have always supported you.  I shared my stories here on Dkos in your diaries and in emails to you regarding the abuse that I and my friends suffered from catholic priests.

              Second, the only point of disagreement I have with the diarist is that she refuses to follow the President's lead as to how to deal with this situation, i.e. don't include the spouses.

              I am sorry for your pain.  However, I cannot believe that even repugnant Repubs want to hurt or kill children.   The laws that exist are the result of both parties screwing up, whether with good intentions or not.  If what you suggest (sterilization?) is the case or even possible, all is lost regardless of what the people desire or believe is possible in 2012.

              "Vote Obama, he won' sterilize you!"

              That doesn't sound right at all....

              Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

              by EdMass on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 05:35:26 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

              •  just because you can't bring yourself to believe (3+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                2thanks, blueoasis, Remediator

                it, doesn't mean there isn't decades of evidence that that is exactly what they believe.

                •  wu ming, you have aimed the flashlight (0+ / 0-)

                  right smack dab at the Republican record.  

                  I say good for you.

                  And I agree -- bad for the Republicans.  They have a now-decades-old legislative record of exclusion and discrimination.  

                  It would be helpful for their rank and file to begin with Nixon's "Southern Strategy," because it is a kind of watermark for what motivates them to exclude.  

                  If it's ok with rank and file Republicans to fear-monger based on race, then no wonder they're voting for people like Romney and Santorum.

              •  This isn't a personal attack on you (5+ / 0-)

                just a very strong disagreement, based on my personal experience. Yes, this really is how many of these people think. As I said, there isn't any desire to kill or maim children, but there is certainly an overwhelming desire to punish women in my situation for having children outside of what they deem acceptable circumstances.

                I fought these battles quite often on the mommy boards I talked about- this was actually my introduction into the world of politics. I never cared about it before until I realized that there was a political philosophy out there who's proponents wanted to not only take my child away from me but prevent me from having any future children. Have you never heard the argument that all moms on welfare should be forced to have their tubes tied as a condition of receiving aid? It's pretty much doctrinaire among conservatives. I've even heard it from some claiming to be liberal! This doesn't cause me pain, by the way-it just makes me angry and disgusted. I know I'm an awesome mom.

                If you want to see how the conservative movement views single unwed mothers, Google "Ann Coulter Single Mothers" and read the venom she spews. She is a proponent of forced adoption, among other things, and is pretty much a mainstream conservative commentator.

                I'm not keen on attacking candidates spouses, by the way. But I don't see how this diary does that at all-it is simply raising the issue of Mitt Romney's hypocrisy on this particular issue, which I think is pretty fair game.

                The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
                Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

                by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 07:01:28 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

              •  OK, that "walk a mile" thing was unnnecessary (1+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                2thanks

                I do apologize for that. I just get a bit amped up about this issue because it hits so close to home.

                The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places ~Ernest Hemingway
                Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle ~ Anonymous

                by SwedishJewfish on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 07:06:39 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  I respect you and I will reconsider my opinions (2+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  SwedishJewfish, 2thanks

                  and investigate where you have led me.

                  Thanks, as always.  

                  Peace   ;-)

                  Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

                  by EdMass on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 07:16:24 PM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

    •  You were a *single* unmarried (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      SwedishJewfish, 2thanks

      Mom, which was why they were vitriolic (must be a "slut")!

      No martyr syndrome to speak of.

      Collecting TANF was perceived as a mortal "sin" (on the dole); however, they were providing free labor (behaving as subjugated slaves to their husbands).

      Typical why pay for the cow, when you can get the milk for free? meme.

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

  • Recommended (145)
  • Community (55)
  • Baltimore (38)
  • Civil Rights (36)
  • Bernie Sanders (31)
  • Culture (28)
  • Elections (28)
  • Economy (27)
  • Law (24)
  • Texas (23)
  • 2016 (20)
  • Rescued (19)
  • Labor (19)
  • Hillary Clinton (18)
  • Education (18)
  • Environment (18)
  • Media (16)
  • Freddie Gray (16)
  • Barack Obama (16)
  • Racism (16)
  • Click here for the mobile view of the site