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  •  See, that's the thing (2+ / 0-)
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    FloridaSNMOM, carolanne

    we are limited by our disabilities, and often, the disability changes the direction of our lives - the young man who was going to be working for a magazine now designing skin care products for paralyzed people for example.

    This saying annoys me because it tries to gloss over the disability, to act as if we don't have those limits and those sometimes drastic changes in our lives.

    My disability definitely defines me.

    My disability is not me.

    There is a difference between these two statements.

    In the first, my disability limits me in some ways, and it defines what I can do and how I do that, and how others have to sometimes accommodate me (assuming they want to accommodate me, they don't have to). It determines, in some cases, what careers I can pursue (for me, I'll never be a stage manager again - can't hear the microphone feedback), and what careers I will be allowed to pursue without hindrance (I do phone work - possible because of computers and voice to text programs - but I have to fight every day to keep my job and not be forced off onto SS disability).

    In the second, I am saying I am no more my disability than I am my hair color or my shoe size. My personality my interests, my innate character remain basically the same.

    Yes, it's semantics.  It's important to make those distinctions because one acknowledges that certain limits now exist (and it's really Not Good to ignore those limits and pretend I really can hear - that's just stupid) and the other reinforces that I am me, warts, disabilities and all.

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    by Noddy on Wed Nov 14, 2012 at 12:51:03 PM PST

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    •  I never said your disability IS you. ?? (3+ / 0-)
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      FloridaSNMOM, Noddy, carolanne

      I'm merely saying, yes, a disability gives some information to people on you but it's one among many things and should not be accepted or taken or given as a definition or a limitation, and by limitation I mean this:

      Yes, you are limited. I am limited in what I can do.

      But on the other hand I am not limited in my personhood and other abilities to do other things. That is all I meant. Ok?

      So I think we agree on all that. And I can see why anyone with a real disability will take issue with their saying what you said. Good for you for explaining because it isn't easy. Semantics can be a real pain.

      "extreme concentration of income is incompatible with real democracy.... the truth is that the whole nature of our society is at stake." Paul Krugman

      by Gorette on Wed Nov 14, 2012 at 03:20:26 PM PST

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