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View Diary: Two Faces of Holiday Sadness (45 comments)

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  •  We approach poetry and family (2+ / 0-)
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    broths, The Geogre

    somewhat differently I see. For me, the haven that is home is always within me.

    Yes, there are different "families" at different times, temporized, as you say. But there are always one-three soul mates in each temporized family that have stayed in my life and have a deeper connection to my heart than most of my family members.

    But perhaps I had a head start in learning that freedom is an inside job. I was raised Jewish in a small, Southern Baptist town, and from the moment I walked into kindergarten was continuously put in a separate box from the rest of the kids. I learned early to create my own group, usually with the other misfits (which is why I lived so long in NYC when I got out of high school).

    Also, I'm a long time meditator. Meditation really freed me from dwelling in certain dark hallways and taught me how to find peace with what is. I'm reporting this as if it was easy, it wasn't. It was a struggle. But worth the results.

    And the poetry school with which I am associated is the New York School (Ashbery, Guest, Kock, O'Hara, Berrigan, Padgett, Waldman), and one of the teachings of that school involved creating poetry communities. There was lots of hanging out and collaborating on poetry and various poetry projects. Ted Berrigan, my teacher, was great at showing us how to create our own community and family of poets.

    So my initial isolation in my hometown, my meditation, and the wonderful poets who schooled me I guess all contributed to my being able to be less attached to my blood family than I am to my heart connection family. Because that what it is about really. A heart connection. And heart connections are not limited by blood connection.

    That's my view.

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