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View Diary: The Postponement of Grief (55 comments)

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  •  My father's mother lost a 3 year old boy, and was (12+ / 0-)

    widowed young with three other children.

    Her belief was that the hereafter is a beautiful place, and that while we are thinking of those who pass, they will be here with us, but that our remembrance of those who have passed prevents them from being able to let go of us, and keeps them from the place of beauty.

    We were very close, and even closer after my own mother passed. She made sure I understood that our being was intertwined, and that she did not want me to hold her too long when it was her time to go to beauty.  When it was her time, she chose me to open the window.

    I think of her often, but I try not to hold her too long, so she can stay in the place she longed to be, with her son Lenny and her husband.

    I found comfort in her words, for she made a special effort to be sure I would be comforted when the time came to say farewell to her and others. She made it possible to see letting go of grief as a gift to those who have left us.

    If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever. &

    by weck on Mon Dec 10, 2012 at 06:44:55 PM PST

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