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View Diary: Why? CNN and NPR Present a Potpourri of Tragic Mulattoes Before a National Audience (285 comments)

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  •  And maybe you should try (0+ / 0-)

    to listen to what people have to say, even when they don't agree with your infallible pronouncements.

    Ever consider that you might not have "hit the nail on the head" after all?  Do you honestly believe that you are the ultimate arbiter of all things race, and that you get to insult someone's family dynamics in a personal way because of your infallibility?

    •  no, I tell the truth, we can argue and disagree (0+ / 0-)

      about the facts, the theory, and the framework. but if someone wants to make some silly pronouncement that what they teach their kid at home will somehow override centuries of history i call it out as the silliness it is.

      •  You know, there's a way to talk about (0+ / 0-)

        centuries of history without insulting people, without using a term in your title that might have a place in academia but comes off as insulting when it's applied to individual people and people's kids.  Did that poster say that she's lying to her children, telling them that they're "not really black", or that she intends to completely ignore the role that race will play in their lives?  You chose to conclude that, to tell her they can come to her for lies, but you love them and will tell them the truth- and you wonder why she's upset?

        Believe it or not, those of us raising kids of color actually welcome advice and guidance from black people who respect us and our kids.  Right now my daughter is trying to choose which of her black friends might be best to advise my grandson when he has questions we feel are best answered by someone who's lived it.  But the respect has to be there, and it sure did not shine through in this diary.

        •  i used a term that is historically grounded (0+ / 0-)

          is still in use, and is accurate to the degree that race is caught up with fictions of biology and the like. If you are doing that, more power to you. You are doing the right thing.

          As for the original comment, way back up the thread, it was made clear that he/she was choosing to raise their child in some post-racial fantasy land. When children who grow up in such environments come out to the real world they are in for some hard knocks. You are right. I do not respect that choice by parents who raise maladapted "mixed race" children as I think they are doing a disservice to their kids.

          The kids will hopefully figure it out with the help of others.

          •  I did not read her comment (0+ / 0-)

            the way you did. She was talking in broad strokes about raising strong kids- maybe she didn't say what you wanted to hear about race but she said her kids are young.  We didn't talk much about my race with my grandson in other than a casual, answering his questions kind of way until he was four or five and we took him to a museum exhibit on slavery.  We try to make it a topic that is always open but not an obsession.

            Because with both my grandkids, they reached a point where it was like oh please, not another book or movie about slavery or civil rights or role models.  Or as my granddaughter said "Nana, you do know I already have two Ruby Bridges books, right?".  There's a balance between helping them honor their history and making them feel too "other" in our family- the rest of the world might see them as other but we don't and we won't.

            As for "tragic mulattos"- it's an archetype. It might be in use in academia but the black people I know never use it to label each other. And if you mean that my using it to describe my grandkids would be "doing the right thing" then I'll just keep on doing the wrong thing.

            •  as i said, i know some tragic mulattoes (0+ / 0-)

              and have a few in the family...and we call them that. likewise, i have seen real life self-hating uncle ruckus negroes too. they just don't exist on TV or make rulings on the Supreme Court.

              I think you misunderstand the term too. Not all mulattoes are "tragic." That is a very specific reference to psychologically not well integrated people who want to pass. Your grands likely are not going to fit in that box if you keep doing the right thing.

              •  Honestly I've not heard mulatto (1+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                breakingsong

                used in any conversational sense since my grandmother used it when I was a kid.  My daughter's best friend is biracial and she was steaming mad when someone used it to describe her- and it takes a lot to get her steaming mad. I think people get to reject terms they don't like having applied to them, whether you think it's just a misunderstanding or not.

          •  How many mixed-raced children did you raise? (0+ / 0-)

            Together with their white mother? Do you have any practical experience?  

            Just asking because you seem to be convinced you would not make the same mistakes those parents you talk about made.

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