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View Diary: The Human Behind the User Handle (194 comments)

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  •  fine, I accept that as one of my mistakes (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    dov12348, mahakali overdrive

    but, there was a point during the weekend where lots of the rec and recent list were gun diaries. Almost impossible to avoid.

    •  Also - fighting creates drama. (0+ / 0-)

      A good knock down drag out fight (within reason) can greatly heighten interest and readership.  That's the lifeblood of novels and movies - conflict.

      Boehner Just Wants Wife To Listen, Not Come Up With Alternative Debt-Reduction Ideas

      by dov12348 on Mon Jan 21, 2013 at 01:05:38 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  this site grew to what it is despite such behavior (6+ / 0-)

        and, sadly, we've lost many good people BECAUSE of that selfish and childish behavior.

        the minute someone personally attacks the poster instead of the ideas expressed, the whoe place loses!

        •  And we've gained a great many good people. (0+ / 0-)

          Life is change.  People move on for a great number of reasons; and new great writers arrive.  Some can handle insults, some can't.

          Boehner Just Wants Wife To Listen, Not Come Up With Alternative Debt-Reduction Ideas

          by dov12348 on Mon Jan 21, 2013 at 04:05:23 AM PST

          [ Parent ]

          •  why do you seem to think that people NEED to (8+ / 0-)

            handle "insults"?  frankly, it is this attitude that makes the more civilized people on this site take a pass on interacting with the cyberbullies who think hiding behind a keyboard is an excuse to say what they would never say to a person face to face.

            this is NOT for the entertainment of the uncouth - it is for political activism - and to see how many people on this site attack people ON this site when we are supposed to have similar values is disheartening and, frankly, flat out ignorant and stupid.

            there is so much effort placed on being "clever" and "right" and  the best "insult thrower" that the real issues are lost and our battle with those who are damaging this society (duh - republicans and conservatives and neocons) gets lost in the poo-flinging.

            growing up means learning to act in a civil society.  this site was never meant to be an excuse for childish namecalling and immature clique forming.

            the "good" people we've gained are in spite of this behavior, not because of it.

            •  By "handle" I meant ignoring them. (0+ / 0-)

              Boehner Just Wants Wife To Listen, Not Come Up With Alternative Debt-Reduction Ideas

              by dov12348 on Mon Jan 21, 2013 at 02:56:36 PM PST

              [ Parent ]

              •  you do know that there is a diary up now - (0+ / 0-)

                about translator - he committed suicide.

                one of my first thoughts was the ugliness around here of late - a place where he came to bring beauty.

                he was attacked by a group of those people to which many of us refer to as cyber bullies on this site.

                it affected him.  did it cause him to do what he did?  we will never know - but when someone who is very depressed is verbally kicked - we don't KNOW how much that played into his depression.

                so - do we need to find a way to stop this destructive discourse?  did it push translator?  probably not but it may have affected his "safe haven" - the place where he could come and talk himself into staying another day.

                words matter.  harmful words, hurtful words do damage.

                we are all in charge of what we send out into the world - whether those words be kind or unkind, argumentative or conciliatory.

                we ALL need to put a face behind the screen upon which we type.  it is called maturity - growing up, adding a filter, consideration, manners, civility, having an intellectual conversation.  take your pick - i'll settle for just one of those becoming the norm around here so we don't lose more members who no longer feel they can come here and find solace.

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