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View Diary: I affectionately call this bill the, "Make Mary and Joseph Felons Bill." (12 comments)

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  •  Except Jesus was 33 at the time, right? (3+ / 0-)
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    Senor Unoball, Mortifyd, commonmass

    Sheesh.  You'd think these biblical literalists could at least be accurate to their own dang texts.  

    "The extinction of the human race will come from its inability to EMOTIONALLY comprehend the exponential function." -- Edward Teller

    by lgmcp on Thu Feb 28, 2013 at 11:48:58 AM PST

    •  Ah, no, different Jesus story (10+ / 0-)

      I assume she's referring to when Jesus was 12 and he and his family were part of a group traveling back from Jerusalem. Joseph & Mary thought he was with other relatives, then realized he wasn't there.  They went back to Jerusalem and found him teaching in the temple.

      Still doesn't mitigate what a ridiculous bullshit statement this is. Fact is, if the same thing happened here in 2013, I assume Joseph & Mary would in fact be on the phone to the Jerusalem police reporting a missing child.

      Liberalism is trust of the people tempered by prudence. Conservatism is distrust of the people tempered by fear. ~William E. Gladstone, 1866

      by absdoggy on Thu Feb 28, 2013 at 11:53:42 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

    •  No, supposedly 12 or so (6+ / 0-)

      This is the time when Jesus stayed behind at the synagogue for a few days after Passover, and was not noticed he was missing by his parents.

      When his parents went back to Jerusalem to get him, he was found teaching the teachers on the synagogue steps.

      I heard it described as they had a long camel caravan to go home, and a huge extended family. Everybody thought that Jesus was with somebody else in the group.

      Upon finding his son, Joseph was heard to have muttered between clenched teeth, "Jesus k-RIST, when we get home you are going STRAIGHT to your room.....!"

      Please proceed, governor

      by Senor Unoball on Thu Feb 28, 2013 at 11:59:17 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  For some reason (10+ / 0-)

        This line:

        "Jesus k-RIST, when we get home you are going STRAIGHT to your room.....!"
        was left out of the Gospels.

        Please proceed, governor

        by Senor Unoball on Thu Feb 28, 2013 at 12:01:42 PM PST

        [ Parent ]

        •  Old song: for worse mischief He got a whuppin'! (4+ / 0-)


          BITTER WITHY
          (traditional ballad)

          As it fell out on a high holiday
           Small rain from the sky did fall
           Sweet Jesus asked of his own mother dear
           Whether he might play at ball

          To play, to play, dear child she did say
           It's time that you have been gone
           And don't let me hear complaints about you
           At night when you do come home

          Now our Savior walked down into yonder town
           As far as the holy, holy well
           And there he met three of the finest children
           That ever any tongue could tell

          Good morn, good morn, good morn, said they
           Good morning, then said he, said he
           Now which of you three fine children
           Will play at ball with me

          Oh we are lords and ladies sons
           Born in a bowery hall
           And you are but a maiden's child
           Born in an oxen stall

          Now our savior built a bridge with the beams of the sun
           and over the water ran he, ran he
           And the three jolly children followed after him
           And drowned they were all three

          The upward ball and the downward ball
           Their mothers they did wail and squall
           Saying, Mary mild, fetch home your child
           For ours are drownded all

          Then Mary mild picked a handful of withies
           And laid our dear savior across her knee
           And with that handful of withy twigs
           She gave him slashes three

          Oh cursed be to the bitter withy
           That has caused me to smart, to smart
           And that shall be the very first tree
           That shall perish right at the heart

          "The extinction of the human race will come from its inability to EMOTIONALLY comprehend the exponential function." -- Edward Teller

          by lgmcp on Thu Feb 28, 2013 at 12:41:47 PM PST

          [ Parent ]

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