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View Diary: GunFAIL X (181 comments)

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  •  it would read something like this (11+ / 0-)

    1. Fred look outside and saw this kid throwing a cylindrical object made of paper at his house. Fearing for his safety, Fred grabbed his handgun and dispatched the attacker, thereby saving himself from a horrible death, as well as the daily news.

    2. Wilbur woke up in the middle of the night and heard an intruder rooting around in the bathroom. Because of an invisible Star Trek force field which prevented him from seeing whether his wife/girlfriend had gotten up to use the facilities, Wilbur had no choice but to protect himself by grabbing his piece, charging to the bathroom, and blowing the crap out of whoever might be in there. This saved Wilbur from the terrible fate of being dumped when his wife/girlfriend figured out what a nut he was.

    3. Phil (yes, they're all men! so shoot me!) is walking in a public place when a person OF A DIFFERENT RACIAL ORIGIN THAN HIMSELF chooses to exist threateningly in his presence. Phil grabs his gun, chases this strange and exotic person down, and shoots him for his skittles, thereby ensuring that Phil will never have to worry about that particular person of non-compliant race crossing his path again.

    •  We already have that one - in LA about a month (5+ / 0-)

      ago. 2 women + pick up truck + moving quietly down a suburban street in the early AM.

      1. Fred look outside and saw this kid throwing a cylindrical object made of paper at his house. Fearing for his safety, Fred grabbed his handgun and dispatched the attacker, thereby saving himself from a horrible death, as well as the daily news.
      A hundred or so bullets later - both women will likely survive their wounds from the LAPD "defensive" shootout.

      "They did not succeed in taking away our voice" - Angelique Kidjo - Opening the Lightning In a Bottle concert at Radio City Music Hall in New York City - 2003

      by LilithGardener on Fri Mar 22, 2013 at 12:19:10 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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