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View Diary: Rape: Anonymous but Silenced No More (142 comments)

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  •  It's a lot simpler than that. (4+ / 0-)

    When was the last time that your TODO list for the night read something like:

     * Go to the grocery store
     * Pick up the dry cleaning.
     * Fix dinner
     * Work more on the big project.
     * Get raped.
     * Brush teeth

    Yeah, victims DON'T exactly have "get raped" on their TODO list for that night.  Which seems obvious when written that way, but what it means is that you don't have any plan of how to react.  Just simply coming to acceptance with the fact that you're being / have been raped is incredibly difficult, especially if it's someone you know.  You play down what happened.  You blame yourself.  You make excuses for their behavior.  You try to extricate yourself from the situation, but all the while you can still be bound by normal rules of social politeness engrained into you because it can be damned hard to cast them off, even in a situation you very much don't want to be in.  Especially if the other person is still acting all nice (while ignoring your expressed wish for them to stop).

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