Skip to main content

View Diary: Use This Word In a Sentence (69 comments)

Comment Preferences

  •  Very well said (18+ / 0-)

    I've been advocating for years that we need to teach manners, not because we need to teach people which fork to use or how to perform introductions but because the root of manners is consideration for others.  In the teaching of manners, we teach people how to care for other people, how to be kind, how to be considerate, and to do so from a place of confidence and maturity.

    In a well-mannered society, people know how to treat one another and aren't afraid to speak up when they see someone mistreating another.  Or at the very least, calling for authoritative intervention (911, anyone?).

    All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

    by Noddy on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 08:45:16 AM PDT

    •  I don't think it's possible to teach manners (8+ / 0-)

      to privileged, entitled, misanthropes.

      The culture of the wealthy teaches depravity as though it were a responsibility of the privileged.
      Our economic system encourages and rewards sociopaths.

      When you look at the cold, dead eyes of the smiling Paul Ryan as he outlines how he wants to destroy all but the wealthy it can't be attributed to lack of manners.

      I will not be convinced that Pete Peterson, through his  trolls Simpson-Bowles by way of his culture destroying Fix the Dept crusade is just a lack of manners. The kochsuckers, de Vos', Coors, Walton's, Adelson's, Friess' are not lacking in manners, they are sociopaths.

      We are far too kind to them.  Thinking that reason and facts will change their demented minds is too narrow.

      The real problem is truly deep seated mental illness. Until we are able to bring that out into everyday conversation all we're doing is allowing them to distract us w/the diversions they create daily that are destroying our country and the planet.

      "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

      by BrianParker14 on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 10:33:28 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  I don't think reason and facts (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        marina, happymisanthropy

        will change their mind, but in learning manners, they pick up the consideration for others that manners teaches.

        Personally, I don't think it's too late for anyone to learn manners, but the lessons are harder and take longer to pierce through. But it is possible.

        Manners are best learned young - I'd start at birth, and during the beginning language lessons and in the learning to walk and in the exploration of their world.

        Manners used to be so prevalent in my generation (I am slightly older than the hippy generation), and each generation has learned less and less of real manners and more and more of the smarminess that passes for manners.

        But even the smarmy people can be taught. And the clueless and privileged.

        All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

        by Noddy on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 11:09:35 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Only if there's money in it for them. (4+ / 0-)

          Of course I believe in manners, but the wealthy have an entirely different view.  They see manners not as a means of cooperating and being civil, but as a means to an end...money.

          And of course manners are critical to a young persons ability to see humanity in themselves and others.

          I've learned, however, the wealthy use it, like everything else, as a means to acquire more money and disdain from using it on those they can't get something from.

          Eg., Prouty's tape of Rmoney where Rmoney stormed into the room demanding service from his perceived lessers.  That's a perfect example of my experiences of how the wealthy ignore manners w/the non-wealthy.

          Sociopaths are very charming.

          "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

          by BrianParker14 on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 11:46:12 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  We must be working from a different (2+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            Sam Sara, pragmaticidealist

            set of definition for manners, because what you are describing isn't manners, it's etiquette.  and those are two different things entirely, no matter how closely they resemble one another.

            All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

            by Noddy on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 12:16:42 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  Difference betw Etiquette and manners (0+ / 0-)

              Etiquette and manners are both critical to functioning in society. While both of these concepts involve rules of behavior, they are slightly different, and they involve different types of skills. They also vary from culture to culture, as standards of conduct are heavily based on cultural tradition and heritage. The primary distinction between etiquette and manners is that the first includes specific rules of conduct, while the other is more generalized.

              Manners involve general behavioral guidelines, such as treating the elderly with respect and courtesy. Etiquette is a specific code of behavior, with an example of etiquette being knowledge of the proper mode of address for a queen, which is, incidentally "Your Majesty." In some societies, people regard etiquette as elitist and unnecessarily refined, but this is actually not the case. Many of the rules of etiquette are already practiced by people with good manners, and a demonstration of familiarity with etiquette and manners will mark someone as cultured, polite company.

              "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

              by BrianParker14 on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 04:32:42 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

              •  The definition of (0+ / 0-)

                etiquette is more or less correct, but your definition of manners is not.

                Manners cross etiquette lines and social lines - a well-mannered person is comfortable in unfamiliar situations and with people from all walks of life and all cultures.  A well-mannered person will be forgiven a great many breaches of etiquette, but it's much harder to forgive an ill-mannered person even when they meticulously adhere to each and every etiquette dictate.

                Manners is not "general behavioral guidelines" because that can be interpreted in many ways, not all of which are what one would consider good manners.  Modern general behavioral guidelines seem to allow for a great deal of selfishness and self-indulgence at the expense of those about them. "What?  I was only doing what everyone else does!" Nope, "general behavioral guidelines" just doesn't measure up to proper good manners.

                Manners is compromised of actions based on consideration for others.

                All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

                by Noddy on Tue Mar 19, 2013 at 06:09:56 AM PDT

                [ Parent ]

      •  Today on Democracy Now Arundhati Roy (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        3goldens, Phoebe Loosinhouse

        refers to the American foreign policy regarding our wars as psychosis. About the Iraq War she says:

        ...But who benefited from this war? Did the U.S. government? Did the U.S. people benefit? Did they get the oil contracts that they wanted, in the way that they wanted? The answer is no. And yet, today you hear Dick Cheney saying he would do it all over again in a second.

        So, unfortunately, we are dealing with psychosis. We are dealing with a psychopathic situation. And all of us, including myself, we can’t do anything but keep being reasonable, keep saying what needs to be said. ...

        The entire interview is worth a read.

        Force is the midwife of every old society pregnant with a new one. Marx

        by Marihilda on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 02:16:36 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  What needs to be said... (0+ / 0-)

          is that we are dealing w/sociopaths!

          Not the distractions they creates like crashing the American economy or a thousand other cruel things they hurl at Americans daily. But the fact they are truly mentally ill.
          Paul Ryan's cold, dead eyes, while smiling and producing a budget that would hurt hundreds of millions of Americans is only a distraction.

          The real fact is he is only a tool of the Peterson's, the Koch's, the Coors, the Simmons, the Friess', the Walton's etc.  They are the sociopaths who have bought the republican't party and use as a front to destroy humans and suck every ounce of life out of humanity.

          Conversation should be about what should be done with those sociopaths with only a mention of the terror they are causing.  All else is misleading and a distraction from the true problem we are confronted w/.

          Sociopaths are the true plague on America and the world and no one wants to acknowledge it, not even here.

          "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

          by BrianParker14 on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 06:35:33 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site