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  •  We must be working from a different (2+ / 0-)
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    Sam Sara, pragmaticidealist

    set of definition for manners, because what you are describing isn't manners, it's etiquette.  and those are two different things entirely, no matter how closely they resemble one another.

    All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

    by Noddy on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 12:16:42 PM PDT

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    •  Difference betw Etiquette and manners (0+ / 0-)

      Etiquette and manners are both critical to functioning in society. While both of these concepts involve rules of behavior, they are slightly different, and they involve different types of skills. They also vary from culture to culture, as standards of conduct are heavily based on cultural tradition and heritage. The primary distinction between etiquette and manners is that the first includes specific rules of conduct, while the other is more generalized.

      Manners involve general behavioral guidelines, such as treating the elderly with respect and courtesy. Etiquette is a specific code of behavior, with an example of etiquette being knowledge of the proper mode of address for a queen, which is, incidentally "Your Majesty." In some societies, people regard etiquette as elitist and unnecessarily refined, but this is actually not the case. Many of the rules of etiquette are already practiced by people with good manners, and a demonstration of familiarity with etiquette and manners will mark someone as cultured, polite company.

      "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

      by BrianParker14 on Mon Mar 18, 2013 at 04:32:42 PM PDT

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      •  The definition of (0+ / 0-)

        etiquette is more or less correct, but your definition of manners is not.

        Manners cross etiquette lines and social lines - a well-mannered person is comfortable in unfamiliar situations and with people from all walks of life and all cultures.  A well-mannered person will be forgiven a great many breaches of etiquette, but it's much harder to forgive an ill-mannered person even when they meticulously adhere to each and every etiquette dictate.

        Manners is not "general behavioral guidelines" because that can be interpreted in many ways, not all of which are what one would consider good manners.  Modern general behavioral guidelines seem to allow for a great deal of selfishness and self-indulgence at the expense of those about them. "What?  I was only doing what everyone else does!" Nope, "general behavioral guidelines" just doesn't measure up to proper good manners.

        Manners is compromised of actions based on consideration for others.

        All knowledge is worth having. Check out OctopodiCon to support steampunk learning and fun. Also, on DKos, check out the Itzl Alert Network.

        by Noddy on Tue Mar 19, 2013 at 06:09:56 AM PDT

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        •  Not my definition. (0+ / 0-)

          googled: What Is the Difference between Etiquette and Manners? - wiseGEEK

          Disputes often are reduced to etymology. agreements on the definitions of words.

          "I freed a thousand slaves, I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves" Harriet Tubman

          by BrianParker14 on Tue Mar 19, 2013 at 09:07:31 AM PDT

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