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View Diary: How not to behave in the men's room (248 comments)

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  •  FAIL (0+ / 0-)

    Not even close.  

    He's not being the gender police.

    Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

    by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 06:42:29 AM PDT

    [ Parent ]

    •  Yes he is. (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Throw The Bums Out, rserven, Avilyn

      He is defining the gender of that child.

      "Til you're so fucking crazy you can't follow their rules" John Lennon - Working Class Hero

      by Horace Boothroyd III on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 06:46:40 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  no he isn't (0+ / 0-)

        the guy made a mistake.

        He thought the boy was a girl it happens.  More importantly it happens outside of the context of transgender issues more often than you would care to admit.  

        Your ego is telling you that there is more to this than meets the eye, but that's not real.

        Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

        by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 07:33:39 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  It wasn't his mistake to make. (3+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          Avilyn, Mortifyd, Remediator

          That child was none of his business.

          "Til you're so fucking crazy you can't follow their rules" John Lennon - Working Class Hero

          by Horace Boothroyd III on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 07:40:12 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  What you said makes absolutely no sense. (0+ / 0-)

            You're just being a baby about it now.  

            The nature of mistakes are spontaneous so they don't have posession prior to occuring.

            Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

            by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 08:39:16 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  not his kid (2+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              rserven, Remediator

              he should have finished up, washed his hands and left the room, not run out to scream at the kid, the adult and whomever else was watching him have his little fit about someone might see his junk oh noez.

              This is HOW it starts when people feel they have a right to beat the shit out of "non-conformative" people.  "They MADE me do it, they weren't supposed to be there."

              The boy WAS supposed to be there, he was using the facilities.  The length of his hair should not be an issue in the 21st century.

              And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

              by Mortifyd on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 04:11:18 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

              •  Total crap (0+ / 0-)

                You can't dictate proper behavior to such a specific degree.

                It's not how it starts, you don't know the guy and you don't know enough about the situation to make such ridiculous  claims.  

                The length of the kids hair isn't the issue, the guy thought he was a girl and nothing more.  I'm sure he's seen boys with long hair before.  

                It's called a fucking mistake, I'm sure you've been forgiven before.  Try it out sometime.

                Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

                by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 06:23:44 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  Most grown-ups don't scream and (2+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  Mortifyd, rserven

                  holler at others when they're in a restroom.  

                  At least not in my experience.  

                  There's visible evidence of most guys taking a leak, washing their hands, and heading out the door.  It's brief.  It's functional.  It's necessary.  And that's basically how it works.

                  Ben goes in to pee.  Some guy in there already thinks Ben is a girl.  But Ben is not a girl.  The guy chases him from the restroom and subsequently screams at his mother, referring to her son as an 'it.'

                  That really sucks on the Adult Behavioral Index.

                  •  Yes it does (0+ / 0-)

                    but that's it.  

                    Nothing about that says anything beyond the point you just made.  Everything else is just prejudice and projection, especially if we are not getting info from the guy who did the screaming.

                    Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

                    by mim5677 on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:05:22 AM PDT

                    [ Parent ]

                •  why are you so willing to stand up for someone (2+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  Remediator, rserven

                  who screamed at a child and a parent referring to a child as an "it" and think that's ok?  That's NOT a mistake.  That's being a freaking weirdo.  That's gender policing other people.  That is making a mountain out of a molehill - not the parent talking about the incident.

                  And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

                  by Mortifyd on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 07:07:28 PM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

                  •  Because (0+ / 0-)

                    it's just not enough information for so many people to be so certain about who and what this guy is.

                    If I had to rank people in order of who I think is the worst kind of person or what the worst thing you can do to someone.  

                    This guy wouldn't show up.  He yelled at a kid, he didn't call the kid a name, he didn't hit the kid, he didn't hit the mother, from what she wrote he barely said more than 30 words and that's not a lot.

                    If he is making a mountain out of a molehill, then what is a diary with 250 plus recs and comments?

                    The guy has been accused of having a small cock, beating a child if they were older, being a weirdo.  Implications of murder and so on and so on.  

                    They are both making a mountain out of a molehill.  It obviously is bigger to the parent than you are letting on as she wrote about a molehill, then someone copy and pasted that molehill and created their own molehill which obviously a lot of people thought was more than that considering the response.  

                    Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

                    by mim5677 on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:03:33 AM PDT

                    [ Parent ]

                    •  normal adults do not scream and call kids ITS (2+ / 0-)
                      Recommended by:
                      rserven, Remediator

                      How do you not get this?  How do you not see a problem with this?  How do you not understand that this is not only not normal but not socially acceptable behaviour?

                      And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

                      by Mortifyd on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:08:29 AM PDT

                      [ Parent ]

                •  hold on a sec, you GBCW'd Apr 3 2012 (1+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  rserven

                  So why are you here supporting the verbal harassment and abuse of a woman and child again?

                  And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

                  by Mortifyd on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:31:05 AM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

        •  So why was he screaming hysterically about (5+ / 0-)

          it if it was just a little mistake then and why did he keep screaming at the mother and even calling her a liar even after being told so?

          You have watched Faux News, now lose 2d10 SAN.

          by Throw The Bums Out on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 08:57:27 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  He didn't call her a liar and she didn't even say (0+ / 0-)

            he did and you don't know if he was screaming histerically or not.  

            People are just making these interpretations based on one persons account of an event.

            He thought the boy was a girl plain and simple and even worse didn't think an unaccompanied little girl should be in the mens room. OH NO!!!!!

            The guy made a mistake, so what if he overreacted, it's no worse than what the mother is doing.  He raised his voice at someone, big deal.  One of the people that responded to me said he would most likely have beaten the kid if he was a bit older.  Now that's fucking stupid.

            Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

            by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 11:19:37 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  Why would you think it is "fucking stupid"? (2+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              Mortifyd, Remediator

              Do you not believe that people perceived as being in the wrong restroom get assaulted?

              •  Because the connection isn't there. (0+ / 0-)

                This person is making a leap based on two unrelated events and a hypothetical situation based on an embarrassingly limited amount of information.  

                Do I believe that people get assaulted for going in to the perceived wrong restroom?  Yes

                Do I believe you can predict whether a man would assault what he thought was a woman that turned out to be a man going into a restroom, based on an account of an interaction with a child and an exchange of words that didn't exceed the count of 50?  Absolutely not.

                You can't say what that man would do.  We don't have enough information about him to say for certain what his attitude is towards transgendered people and we certainly don't have enough information about him to say whether he would physically assault or even kill someone.  I don't think I am going out on a limb when I say that one needs to think more clearly about what actions they would pin on an individual they don't know or have never met.  We still call that prejudice and bigotry where I'm from...

                I don't want to live in a world where an adult getting upset as a child and raising their voice in newsworthy.  It's a disagreement over something stupid.  Nothing to write home about.    

                Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

                by mim5677 on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 06:19:05 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  I don't want to live in a world where an adult (2+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  Remediator, rserven

                  JUSTIFIES someone screaming at a child.  Like you are.

                  And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

                  by Mortifyd on Mon Mar 25, 2013 at 07:43:51 PM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

                  •  Agree. There's a zone of functionality (2+ / 0-)
                    Recommended by:
                    Mortifyd, rserven

                    one should expect in a public restroom.  That is, folks are there in the first place to pee, then they wash their hands, and then they leave.  

                    There's no pool table or trampoline or art gallery.  You just pee, wash up, and head out the door.  

                    Ben came in to pee.  The guy, seeing his long hair, thought he was a girl, and exploded.  In some of the accounts on the web, it's clear Ben told the man he was male, but the screamer just chased him out of the restroom and kept referring to him as an 'it.'

                    I'm not getting any justification for the screaming guy.  I'm getting quite a bit of zip and clarity from Ben's mother, though.  I really like that letter.  

                  •  It's not a justification (0+ / 0-)

                    of his actions.  

                    It's a repudiation of the people here who are going beyond rational thought in their negative attitude towards a person who can't defend themselves to the group.  

                    With such limited information on what happened, you can say his behavior was bad, but you can't say why, you can't say what kind of person he is, and you certainly can't imply that he would do anything beyond what he did.

                    Like I said already, a kid got yelled at and so did a mom.  If that's the worst thing that happens to them all year blog about that.

                    Who ya gonna shoot wit dat homie, you'd rather blast an original instead of a phony, true macaroni, you don't even know me, and why does your gun say n****z only?

                    by mim5677 on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:10:44 AM PDT

                    [ Parent ]

                    •  sorry, no. (3+ / 0-)

                      Too many of us actually know what it's like to have this happen and how it can escalate.  I can need to know WHY he thought it was ok to scream at a child and then a parent and refer to a boy as an "it" - I just need to know it's wrong.  

                      And guess what - it's wrong.

                      He thought he had the right to verbally abuse a child because in HIS mind the child was not masculine enough.  Then he thought he had the right to verbally abuse the boy's mother and insist the boy was a girl despite being told otherwise. Repeatedly.

                      That is NOT acceptable behaviour.  It simply isn't.  Abuse is NEVER ok.  So why don't you stop digging before you reach China - you're supporting abuse.

                      And we sail and we sail and we never see land, just the rum in the bottle and a pipe in my hand...

                      by Mortifyd on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 06:23:47 AM PDT

                      [ Parent ]

                    •  Nope. We can read the accounts (1+ / 0-)
                      Recommended by:
                      rserven

                      of any news story or opinion piece we want.  The web brings us stuff 24/7.

                      And we can form opinions and express them.

                      Not a shred of "over-reaction" involved.

                      Dig it.

            •  The letter is from this child's mother. She (2+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              Mortifyd, rserven

              references screaming more than once.  

              Sounds like very valid testimony to me.  

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