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View Diary: "Look for the helpers. You'll always find people who are helping." -- Fred Rogers (34 comments)

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  •  tough to joke... (23+ / 0-)

    when Mass General releases a statement that says most cases they are seeing are leg amputations and you remember that these are people who just finished a marathon.

    They'll be plenty of time for pointed humor at a later date.

    I sing praises in the church of nonsense, but in my heart I'm still an atheist, demanding sense of all things.

    by jbou on Mon Apr 15, 2013 at 03:32:35 PM PDT

    [ Parent ]

    •  Like I said, it's ok if you're not up to joking, (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      jbou, samddobermann

      and it's certainly ok if people directly affected aren't.

      But at the same time, I don't think people who can joke should be told it's too soon.  "We can't joke about this" is a very close cousin to "We can't debate about this", and the latter caused a lot of harm in the post-9-11 period.  

      © cai Visit to join the fight against global warming.

      by cai on Mon Apr 15, 2013 at 03:39:37 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  The victims can do whatever they want (14+ / 0-)

        If they find humor helps them cope, good for them. Actually read an interesting, and pertinent column, this weekend.

        Here's the essential meat of it

        Draw a circle. This is the center ring. In it, put the name of the person at the center of the current trauma. For Katie’s aneurysm, that’s Katie. Now draw a larger circle around the first one. In that ring put the name of the person next closest to the trauma. In the case of Katie’s aneurysm, that was Katie’s husband, Pat. Repeat the process as many times as you need to. In each larger ring put the next closest people. Parents and children before more distant relatives. Intimate friends in smaller rings, less intimate friends in larger ones. When you are done you have a Kvetching Order. One of Susan’s patients found it useful to tape it to her refrigerator.

        Here are the rules. The person in the center ring can say anything she wants to anyone, anywhere. She can kvetch and complain and whine and moan and curse the heavens and say, “Life is unfair” and “Why me?” That’s the one payoff for being in the center ring.

        Everyone else can say those things too, but only to people in larger rings.

        "No one life is more important than another. No one voice is more valid than another. Each life is a treasure. Each voice deserves to be heard." Patriot Daily News Clearinghouse & Onomastic

        by Catte Nappe on Mon Apr 15, 2013 at 04:13:56 PM PDT

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      •  cops, ER docs and nures, military, etc. (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        jbou, blueoasis, Cassandra Waites

        are probably better at joking their way through this sort of thing. I think it's hard for people who aren't in those kinds of fields to understand.

    •  Not saying you (or anyone) SHOULD joke. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      jbou, samddobermann

      Just that it's one way to cope, and it can be a positive one.

      © cai Visit to join the fight against global warming.

      by cai on Mon Apr 15, 2013 at 03:41:34 PM PDT

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    •  sounds like it was mostly (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:

      children and spectators, which doesn't make it any better...and yes, hard to find the humor at the moment.  I don't live in Boston, but I visit it frequently and it's the city I'm applying to jobs to. It feels like home to me and always has, so this one really hit me.

    •  Most of the people injured were (0+ / 0-)

      behind the barriers for watchers. They were the spectators rather than the runners. Many runners in the area had ringing ears and many were knocked down by the shock waves. The serious injuries mainly, if not all, hit the spectators.

      I'm asking you to believe. Not in my ability to bring about real change in Washington ... *I'm asking you to believe in yours.* Barack Obama

      by samddobermann on Tue Apr 16, 2013 at 04:31:07 AM PDT

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      •  But this happened after the first wave of runners (0+ / 0-)

        were finished and several had transitioned into becoming spectators.  The area of the first bomb was adjacent to where the previous finishers were taking a rest, finalizing paperwork, and getting post-run medical checks.

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