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View Diary: The Weaponized Lie of Self-Reliance (59 comments)

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  •  I wasn't clear at all (1+ / 0-)
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    Homer177

    The only thing I ever got from seeing a shrink was that I kept speaking of my heart condition as an Other, as some overlay placed atop "me." (It was really severe and a major distortion for me as a kid.) That allowed me to blame "it" and to see "it" as a mark. When I started to think, instead, that "I am all of this" -- the body I had -- then I could think in the present. Then I could stop thinking in a dualism.

    I've noticed that people who get sick tend to freak out more about the sickness or to deny it more than people who grow up sick, but even those of us with lifelong diseases are tempted to regard our bodies as "not me."

    I think that the "self-reliant" turds would not only displace their bodies and think of any disability as something Someone did to them, but they would also think of all the conspiracies to do this "to" them.

    When they see someone who is differently bodied, they see only the difference. After all, these are people who meet a homosexual and can only think about how that person has sex -- which is a fairly small part of most folks' days/weeks. All of what that person has in common with everyone else is something they can't see. They can only see this one relatively unimportant-to-work aspect of life outside of work. When they meet an African American, they don't see the person, but "a Black." The 99.99% in common is invisible to them, but the skin color is marked and burned into their consciousness, conversation, and memory. If they see a person with leg braces, or with any thing else, that is all they can see, because these are people who cannot conceive of "people" being anything but what they know of themselves, and that's not usually very much.

    Best of luck with your search. I wish I had a tip, but I don't. When it comes to ways of getting cosmetics-addled HR folks with cologne/perfume soaked handshakes to think of wider horizons, I'm clueless.

    Everyone is innocent of some crime.

    by The Geogre on Thu Apr 25, 2013 at 06:22:56 PM PDT

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