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View Diary: What Does Being Gay In America Mean? (72 comments)

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  •  Very thoughtful and moving. Thank you. (5+ / 0-)

    I think lesbians tend to have it easier than gay men.  We're depicted so rarely in either gay or straight media that we've had the time and space to find our own place in the community.  Fortunately, the Advocate and Out never really highlighted a rockin' hot lifestyle for lesbians and we never expected life to be an endless party.  

    Most of the lesbians I know are middle-class but I also know plenty who are downright impoverished.  You'll never read about them in The Advocate but they exist in droves.  I think there's more classism in the gay community - I've had lots of gay friends - than in the lesbian community.  We tend to take people as they come because we know that we may not share the same salaries but we share common struggles.  Maybe women are better trained early in life to be empathic, I don't know.

    I'll just add that I detest the relentless marketing targeted at the LGBT community, most of which gives the impression we do nothing but party and go to the gym.  I soured on SF Pride because every float was slapped with a corporate sponsor, usually a booze company, and while I know they need the funds it just felt like a marketing assault after a couple of hours.  I stopped going after years of attendance because the endless commercialization of the event just became nauseating.

    you don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows

    by Dem Beans on Mon Jun 10, 2013 at 07:14:54 PM PDT

    •  Well, the only lesbians that I have met (that I (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Dem Beans

      know of, anyway) have all been performers such as Michelle Mynx (yes, that Michelle Mynx) and of course being live performers are typically pretty extreme extroverts.  Though to be fair, the only reason I even know that is because it is on her public facebook page (and a couple of others because the incorporated that into their show when they needed to kill time, Margaret Cho style).

      You have watched Faux News, now lose 2d10 SAN.

      by Throw The Bums Out on Mon Jun 10, 2013 at 09:06:30 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  Thank you and I agree with you. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Dem Beans, 714day

      The relentless marketing targeted at LGBTs is noxious and does no service to us in its depictions of who gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders are as individuals and how we live our lives. Professor Badgett's own study from UCLA directly studied how our economic reality differs so dramatically from how we're being depicted. I stopped going to Gay Pride a few years ago because I just got sick of it, too.

      I dearly wanted to comment more on how this study speaks to what lesbians deal with economically, but it would've rung false.  I wish I could've offered some real insight on how women in the LGBT community are struggling or thriving financially. Better for me not to attempt to speak on that since I don't have first hand experience or a close lesbian friend to enlighten me about it.

      I do think women are raised to show more empathy. I also think it's deplorable that outside of superstars like Ellen or Melissa "our" media does such an inconsistent and weak job focusing on women in our community.

      The whole "hot rockin' lifestyle" you mention rings very hollow and empty after you reach a certain age. (IMHO)

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