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View Diary: Re-Improved Colbert transcript (now with complete text of Colbert-Thomas video!) (207 comments)

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  •  Or is it factinista? n/t (9+ / 0-)

    Reality has a well-known liberal bias. - Stephen Colbert

    by Unusual Suspect on Sun Apr 30, 2006 at 11:11:48 AM PDT

    [ Parent ]

    •  'Stephen, this is Comedy Central. You're fired. (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      gpclay, easong, djalix976

      We're tearing up your contract.  Orders from the White House.  And don't bother coming back to the office, the FBI came and got all your stuff.  Just go back to your apartment, I think they've got some guys waiting there to escort you to Gitmo.  Buh-bye."

      •  Oh, they'd be insane to cut his show NOW (4+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        gpclay, easong, exiledfromTN, Dvalkure

        Especially after this "hot fucking damn right on" display.  His ratings are gonna SOAR now.  Hell yeah.

        "Anyone effin tired of this crap, yet?" IMPEACH!!!!!

        by smugbug on Sun Apr 30, 2006 at 03:57:04 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  AP ONLY COVERED BUSH SIAMESE TWIN ACT (12+ / 0-)

          And that's all that's on AOL's news page.

          So I sent AP a letter, letting them in on what their reporter obviously missed, and you might want to fill the Associated Press in, too.

          info@ap.org

          Hey, AP: You missed the real news at the White House Correspondents dinner.

          It wasn't the silly "Bush look-a-like" as everyone there was aware, but Stephen Colbert's brilliant monologue and short film.

          One more reason I don't get my news from newspapers -- or AP -- anymore. The blogs actually cover what's news, not the establishment spin and coverup.

          So, since your reporter apparently left you out of the loop, below is the transcript of Colbert's speech:

          (At which point, I sent the transcript in the diary above.)

    •  So Sorry - laughing (5+ / 0-)

      so hard I hit the 'troll' button, instead of the recco ! but I got it fixed already.

      I am waiting for the 2nd installment of the vid clip to down load on my slow connexion...so it is GREAT to read the whole thing.
      Man ! It was weird ( during the first third ) to see how uncomfortable I was feeling...like many in the crowd. We are thoroughly brain-washed into some kind of zombie power appeasing mode...I have to keep reminding myself that this pResident is illegal and immoral and made himself a laughing stock long before dear Steven Colbert decided to speak some truth to power !
      He 's great and I can't wait to see the job audition portion - as well as the 'leaving in a hissy-huff' portion.
      Whew ! Way to go

      'We're sick and tired of being sick and tired' ~ St.FannyLou Hamer

      by Dvalkure on Sun Apr 30, 2006 at 04:57:28 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Who knew it would happen? (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Creosote, Benjaminwise

        This year, April Fool's Day came on the last day of the month...and the Chimp was the Fool.

        We're all in this together.

        by JTML on Sun Apr 30, 2006 at 09:51:39 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

      •  You mean 'speaking truthiness to power' :-) (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        gpclay, Demena

        And as some of the other posters have said, a picture-in-picture of Chimpy and Pickles' expressions would have been great!

        On second thought, 25 minutes of Chimpy...maybe that's not such a good idea after all.

        Colbert's performance was the only thing I've ever seen that can match David Letterman's moment while hosting the Oscars, where - in front of both Hollywood and over a billion of their fans around the world - for "Stupid Oscars Pet Tricks" he brought out a dog that was conditioned to chase its tail in response to applause.  And the louder the applause, the faster and more mindlessly the dog would chase.

        At first the audience laughed and applauded wildly.  But as the bit went on and on, it became clear the dog truly would never stop as long as someone was applauding.  The dog's seemingly clever trick began to look more and more like a desperate and uncontrollable need for attention and approval, and there was that same slowly dawning realization of "hey, is he making fun of us?"

        Of course, Bush doesn't quite have the power to have someone executed the way that Oprah does, but still.

        In all seriousness, Colbert's performance was one of the bravest and most courageous I've ever seen.

        Thank you, Stephen Colbert.

        25th Amendment - Use It Or Lose It!

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