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Please begin with an informative title:

Angel: Stop, don't kill your son. God was just testing your loyalty.

Abraham: What the fuck is wrong with that guy?

God dude, if you don't want people eating apples, put the fucking tree on top of a mountain. Maybe have a few Minotaurs guarding the shit.

Why does everything have to be defined as theism, atheism or agnosticism. Can't I just smoke bud and believe in the Universe?

I often criticize religious people but they rarely retaliate. Can't help but respect that. Criticizing an atheist is like declaring war.

Intro

You must enter an Intro for your Diary Entry between 300 and 1150 characters long (that's approximately 50-175 words without any html or formatting markup).

A good night's sleep is crucial to good health. It is also crucial to making you much more tolerable to your loved ones.

If you're in a crowded area, walk around with your index finger on your ear and say shit like "I have a visual on the assassin, sir."

Simple happiness tip: always ignore the recommended serving size, dosage, or whatever.

Get high on life! By using drugs!

Extended (Optional)

Poll

If you're planning a shooting spree, please dress up as Waldo. The police manhunt would literally be the funniest shit anyone has ever see.

11%5 votes
38%17 votes
27%12 votes
22%10 votes

| 44 votes | Vote | Results

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