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The annual White House Easter Egg Hunt typically provides a respite from politics and thus is eagerly anticipated by adults as well as children. But today the joyous celebration was briefly disrupted by members of the Tea Party who were convinced the eggs posed a threat to the future security of this country.

Shortly before the hunt was scheduled to begin Monday morning,  Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN6) held a press conference in front of the White House to praise President Obama for finally taking a proactive stance against terrorism.

"First, I want to personally thank President Obama for calling today's hunt.  
For years. I've tried to persuade this Administration to aggressively track down and eliminate those who seek to do this country harm. I'm so relieved the threat posed by these covert foreign agents is finally being taken seriously by the White House," said Bachmann

Even members of the press corps accustomed to her ramblings were taken off guard. Reporters exchanged confused glances in stunned silence until someone from the Congresswoman's home state finally asked "Uh, are you referring to the Easter eggs?"

"Those are terror babies!" shot back Bachmann as she swept her arm toward the brightly colored eggs littering the South Lawn. "You know, they start out little like this and then they hatch and before you know it, they've turned our children against us. Those fluffy ducklings and chicks, they're so cute and the kids follow them everywhere and think 'Wow! They're really neat, I want to be just like them.' Then pretty soon terrorists have infiltrated every lake, creek and river in the country, not to mention the parks and farmland. Their mission is to control our waterways and destroy our agriculture industry."

"We'll all starve to death unless we eliminate this threat!" Bachmann declared as a black SUV sporting 'Live Free or Die' license plates and packed with Tea Partiers screeched to a halt in front of her.

"Did someone say hunt?" eagerly panted former Minnesota Congressman Chip Cravaack as he leaped from the vehicle brandishing his AR-15's. "You betcha," hollered back Sarah Palin as they charged ahead to attack the unsuspecting Easter eggs."Cmon Chip, you shoot 'em and I'll field dress 'em!"

While startled reporters and onlookers ducked for cover, Bachmann continued unfazed. "My favorite gun is an AR-15 because you can be so accurate with it," she observed with smiling admiration as bits of eggs and colored shells flew in every direction across the South Lawn before the Tea Partiers were tackled by stunned secret service agents.

"You can't prepare for this kind of crazy" declared President Obama, defending his security team, "I mean, terror babies... shooting Easter eggs... just what the hell is in that tea they're drinking?

Children who watched the scene were disgusted as well. "If they didn't know how to make egg salad, they should have just asked for help," firmly declared a 4-year-old boy while brushing pieces of egg off his shirt.

Cross Posted from Iron Country Free Press

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