I finally got so irritated with all those damned yellow ribbons that purport to display support for our troops, that I wrote a parody about the phenomenon. Of course, I had to use a song that was as irritating as the yellow ribbons themselves, and Tony Orlando naturally came to mind:
Slap a Yellow Ribbon On My SUV (Sung to the tune of "Tie A Yellow Ribbon 'Round The Ole Oak Tree," performed by Tony Orlando and Dawn)
I never served, didn't have the time
My priorities were elsewhere in my prime
But now I've gotten older
And more patriotic, too
And though I'll never fight a war
There's something I can do
There's something I can do
I'll slap a yellow ribbon
On my SUV
I support our troops
Aren't you proud of me?
'Cuz when I slap that ribbon
On my SUV
I'll take it to town, drive all around
A patriot - that's me!
Oh, when I slap that yellow ribbon
On my SUV
My son has just turned twenty-four
But there's no need for him to fight this war
They will not bring the draft back
At least that's what Dubya said
But if they did I'd hide my kid so he won't end up dead
Take someone else instead
I'll slap a yellow ribbon
On my SUV
I support our troops
Aren't you proud of me?
'Cuz when I slap that ribbon
On my SUV
I'll show that I back our troops in Iraq
It's so plain to see
Oh, when I slap that yellow ribbon
On my SUV
Now if a ribbon seems to be
Not enough, then you will see...
A hundred yellow ribbons
On my SUV
Slap a ribbon on my SUV
Slap a ribbon on my SUV
Slap a ribbon on my SUV
Slap a ribbon on my SUV