Imagine my heartbreak when I saw the following letter. Please read it and my response below (with apologies to Virginia O'Hanlon and the 1897 editors of the New York Sun).
Dear Kossacks--
I am 59 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Fitzmas. Papa says, "If you see it in The Sun, it's so." Please tell me the truth, is there a Fitzmas?
Georgie Bush
The response, edited only slightly, is below the break.
Georgie, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not leaked by an unnamed source. All minds, Georgie, whether they be liberal or conservative, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge. Especially yours.
Yes, Georgie, there is a Fitzmas. It exists as certainly as corruption and duplicity and nepotism exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Fitzmas! It would be as dreary as if there were more than one Georgie. Wait, strike that. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no justice to make tolerable your crooked administration. We should have no enjoyment, except in blog and virtual reality. The external light with which Progressivism fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe in Fitzmas! You might as well not believe in Watergate. You might get your papa to hire men to whitewash all of your misdeeds, but even if you did not see Fitzmas coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees the falling axe, but that is no sign that there is no axe to fall. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Georgie, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.
No Fitzmas! Thank God! it lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Georgie, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, it will continue to make glad the heart of childhood. So pack your bags.