Pssst: shameless plug to all of Molly’s fans here – please, please rec this up so it stays current for an entire day. This won’t work otherwise.
Things have been awfully serious around here lately, and we need to make our venting a bit more, well, fun. Between the trashing of Amanda Marcotte, the Hoekstra/Shadegg memo leak, theyrereal’s "A photograph you'll never forget", the Iran saber-rattling, and the continuing nightmare of Iraq, et cetera et cetera ad nauseum ad infinitum, we need to do the cyber equivalent of putting some gasbag’s mug on a dart board and have at. So here we go. I propose a whole new contest: the Molly Ivins Memorial Chicken Award, given to the biggest boofdah in American political life.
As Molly said,
Some people think you cannot break a dog that has got in the habit of killin' chickens, but my friend John Henry always claimed you could. He said the way to do it is to take one of the chickens the dog has killed and wire the thing around the dog's neck, good and strong. And leave it there until that dead chicken stinks so bad that no other dog or person will even go near that poor beast. Thing'll smell so bad the dog won't be able to stand himself. You leave it on there until the last little bit of flesh rots and falls off, and that dog won't kill chickens again.
I need to state upfront that this isn’t entirely my idea. I must freely admit that Del C gave me the idea in the comments section of Kagro X’s front page story last night "GOP: If we debate the surge, we lose."
The Molly Ivins Memorial Chicken (2+ / 0-)
Wire the thing securely to the neck of the Republican Party. They wanted it, they got it, they boasted in May 2003 that it was all their doing, a war won in the face of Democratic opposition, their Vietnam war done right. Now let them smell it.
Thanks, Del! :-D
But honestly, this award to the Republican party as a whole is just not satisfying enough for me. I’m in a bitter mood, and I really, really want to ridicule, mock and laugh in the face of every single bozo who’s tried to sell us all snake oil. It'll be better for my poor abused stomach lining, for one thing. For another, I think it could actually be fun. One person in particular is not included in this list: President George W. Bush, for the simple reason that Molly tied so many chickens around that dork’s neck that he looks like a poultry slaughterhouse. And he obviously hasn’t got a sense of smell anymore, since attaching all those chickens has had absolutely no effect whatsoever. But everyone else on the Right is fair game, whether they’re presently in government, the media, or some PAC, foundation or (gasp!) university faculty, or have left the public stage.
So, fellow Kossacks, I hereby give you a chance to nominate candidates for the Molly Ivins Memorial Chicken Award. Please, list in the comments here your favorite, and your reason for picking this slob, so that we can later determine who is the skankiest, egg-suckingest, backstabbing piece of lying brainless political trash we’ve observed over the last six years.
I will collate all the nominees posted in the comments, along with briefly stated reasons why they deserve this award, and come up with a slate of choices. Then, over the coming weekend, I’ll put up a poll so everyone can vote and we can have an official winner. Once a winner is chosen, I’ll collate all the reasons and verbally roast the deserving barstid with your quotes.
Again, please rec this up, so it stays active long enough for me to get more than just a handful of nominees.
Let the games begin!!