It has been almost 4 years since an IED in Iraq ended the promise of the future of one in my family.
Leaving behind a few months old baby, my nephew headed first to Kuwait, then the push into Baghdad. To be honest, watching this on tv, it seemed like a game. I cheered with every shock and awe. I honestly thought we were doing the right thing.
Our family backed this 100%, to do any less would be letting down my nephew, or so we thought. We weren't being political, we were simply supporting a loved one.
I don't know what the answer is anymore. I am torn between supporting what he believed in and just simply giving up.
But that isn't what this diary is about.
This is about him and all he stood for and wanted to accomplish.
He wanted to be an oceanographer. He wanted to raise his son. He believed he was doing the right thing, he truly felt for the Iraqi people and felt he would be helping them.
His most important reason for being there is because he was afraid if we didn't go now, his son might have to go in the future.
If he were here, he would be a father, going to college and fullfilling all the great things in his life that he wanted to accomplish.
But he's not.
I remember when he was little, him and his cousin would talk me into letting them do things that no parent would allow (I didn't have kids then so I was an easy mark).
Riding in the trunk of my car? Sure auntie, our parents let us do that all the time.
No bedtime? No, I promise, this time they really DID say we could stay up as late as we wanted.
Ice cream at 1:00am? Yes, our parents run up to quick trip all the time to get it for us.
I won't even go into the most famous story, suffice to say it involved a restaurant, a locked door to the mens room and 3 faucets running at full blast while I stood outside screaming in that whisper (you mom's KNOW what I am talking about) for them to get out of there NOW!
So tonight, when you take that drink of whatever beverage you prefer, please drink a toast to Joel.
Regardless of your feelings on the war, he went because he believed he was making you and I safer. He, like so many parents have done throughout history, sacrificed himself in order to protect his son.
And for that, he should be honored.
As for me, I will forever miss the little boy who thought his aunt was the greatest.