OK. Another sex scandal.
Can we step back and ask ourselves why this happens over and over and over and over again?
It's because men are wired different than women.
Getting mad at men for wanting to have sex with different women is like getting mad at women for getting "hormonal" when they are pregnant. Or getting mad because men have over a billion sperm in each ejaculate and women only have one viable ovum. You can't blame people for their biology.
But we live in a world where males - in order to be considered "grown-up" - have to deny their biology and settle down with one woman for the rest of their lives.
Almost no male is happy in this arrangement. But it's a system that was obviously devised by men, so that they could claim "ownership" (also known as "paternity") of their children.
But, like most greedy schemes, this one has ultimately come back to haunt the very schemers it was supposedly set up to benefit.
I tip my hat to any man who is bold enough to have sex outside his marriage. It's a damn dangerous and expensive act of heroism in the cause of human freedom. It's only the milktoasts, who's sex drive has been weakened by eons of "civilization," who find comfort inside the bounds of monogomy.
In our perverted world, these men are our Upstanding Citizens.
Well, OK. That's one way to set up a society. Make men the little kings of their little fiefdoms, and as long as they play by the rules, they get to "wear the pants." But let one of these so-called kings step outside his designated lair - and blammo! The full weight of the law comes down on him and he loses everything. The wife gets the house. The kids get supported til they're adults. If the little king's job depends on an aura of respectability, he loses his career. All to feed the biology raging in his pants.
But there are other ways of setting up a society. Ones in which our identities are not defined by who our father is. Since nobody ever disputes who one's mother is, a matriarchal society doesn't make such a big deal out of who belongs to whom. Kids are everybody's responsibility, so society is set up in such a way that all kids are taken care of. That becomes a given. Men are uncles to many children. Some children may know who their father is and may form a special bond with him. But it is not a legal bond, it is not burdened with obligation. In matriarchal societies, both sexes are freer to express their natures, both biological and spiritual. Men can have as much sex as they like with as many willing partners as they can find. Or they can settle down with one woman and one family, if that is their choice. In a matriarchal society, the birth of every single child is truly a cause for celebration, because there is no such thing as "unwanted" children, there are no crushing social obligations for the father to "take responsibility" and "pay for" what he has "done." Women cannot be dominated or controlled because they are the de facto heads of families.
It is ironic than the average male actually fares better in a matriarchy than he does in a patriarchy - because patriarchy is not a system that benefits males in general. Patriarchies are set up to benefit ONE MALE: whomever gains dominance over all the other males. Once this domination is established, all the so-called "laws" limiting the dominant male's sexual appetite are out the window. That monogamy jazz is for the grunts, not the bosses.
We see it clearly today. Guys who climb high enough on the economic ladder simply take it on the economic chin when they decide to swap out the aging child-bearer for a new hottie. The poor schlub who's working 50 hours a week to make his mortgage and pay $3.40 to put a gallon of gas in his car knows damn well he can't afford to break up his marriage. It's simply too expensive. Guys who get a little adventurous and decide to "go for it" anyway quite often join that not-so-exclusive club called The Homeless. This is why porno is such a huge industry. It's a hell of a lot cheaper than following nature's call.
So, we celebrate the Wonder of Childbirth and the natural nurturing instincts of "our better halves," marvelling at their maternal capacity to give and give. And in recognition of the miracle of femininity, we forgive our sisters their occassional lapses into sentimentality or "bitchiness" or irrational emotional outbursts because, after all, that's just how God made 'em. You just gotta love 'em all the more and everything'll be alright.
But we don't celebrate studliness the way we do nurturing. Or, we do, but only in perverted ways, indirectly, through media heroes and sports superstars. And nerdy guys in smoking jackets who invent girly magazines that the other males are forced to jerk off to. I don't know how many thousands of years we've been living in patriarchy; and I don't know if, at some time in human evolution, the system served us as a species pretty well. But I know that now, it's an absurdity. Yes, we get to have wars and big expensive techno-toys and we get to accumulate big houses full of lots of stuff with which to compete with our neighbors...and we get to look on proudly at high school graduation, or at the Friday night football game, and say, "That's my boy!" But in most ways this patriarchy bullshit is just exhausting and wasteful and complete misuse of our time here on earth. What could be spent in loving communion, or in wild fucking, or in peaceful contemplation, is instead spent in running through a series of self-created mazes - that are all rigged against us!
Now I know this ain't gonna change just because I write a diary on a website as the entire media lights up once again (for a news cycle) with another sex scandal.
But I'm just trying to point out: it doesn't have to be this way. We are doing this to ourselves. Come on guys! Let's hurry up and let the women take over already! We'll all be much happier and you'll be able to get all the nookie you want!