"Obama is done"
I saw this comment earlier tonight, posted by a Clintonite on the board of First Read on MSNBC.com. The comment was made in reference to the Pastor Jeremiah Wright story, a wet dream of a story for Clintonites who think that the concept of "guilt by association" is going to sink the good ship Obama. But like any wet dream, it will be over all too soon.
Guilty by association. Most of you probably remember hearing this speech in your middle school principal's office, being lectured on the company you keep. Since toeing the line was a requirement to keep my dad from beating my ass, I never knew the pleasure of receiving said lecture. However, I do have a basic understanding based on anecdotal information received as I grew older and faster than my father.
Guilty by association basically means that you are the company you keep. For example: If you hang out with a group of drug dealers, then naturally you're a drug dealer. If you hang out with a group of liars, you're a liar. If you hang out in the men's bathroom, you're Larry Craig. I think that's enough to at least introduce you to the concept.
Here's the kicker. Although I give the Clinton campaign some credit, because they haven't attack Obama on this whole Pastor Jeremiah Wright debacle, her supports here on the intraweb have. They're eating it up like manna from heaven, bathing in it, drinking it in, making love to it, claiming that Obama is guilty by association. Since Obama's pastor said something mildy antagonistic to some people, Obama is somehow not legitimate.
The grasping of straws is a reasonable ploy, especially in the decline of a great empire like the Clintons, just like the end of all great dynasties. I'm sure Shakespeare was wrong when he wrote Julius Caesar’s dying words. When the last dagger struck home in his chest, it was more likely he said "Shame on you Barack Obama" (or the Latin equivalent), rather than "Et tu Brute".
The guilt by association issue is laughable, in the ha-ha way as well as the boo-hoo way. It’s laughable in the ha-ha way because it’s just damned silly. It’s laughable in the boo hoo because it’s just damned sad.
When I was young, my parents shuttled me from church to church many times, in their never-ending quest to find one that would excuse their vices enough for them not to feel guilty while listening to a sermon. Here in the South, I think that's what a lot of church goers want. And often that's what they get. That's why so many churches attack homosexuals and abortion, not because God wants them to, but because it makes them feel good.
But I've heard my share of good preachers too. And although I'm an agnostic, I can tell the difference between the good and the bad. And a good preacher, a good pastor, is one that from time to time will piss you off. They're the ones that say things that no one likes to here. They're the ones who will rattle your cage a little bit, make you a little angry or a little ashamed. And if you're at an impressionable enough age, there the ones who guilt you into trying to forget that girls have a body from the top of their knees to their necks. But some things you just can't forget.
We know what goes on in Barack Obama's church. We know who his pastor was. He was the one who obviously pissed people off. He pissed so many people off apparently, that his church membership was somewhere around 8,000 members. Could you imagine John McCain in a church where the pastor was so emotional he looked like he would spontaneously self-immolate at any moment? I know the man's a war hero, but from the looks of him I don't think he could take it.
What about Hillary? Hillary is what my skater-punk friends would call a poser. I don't know what kind of church she goes to, if she even goes at all, but if she does I bet it’s almost identical to the ones you see in the little model train sets. Perfect and orderly, with an aging membership who would not look kindly at a leader who challenged them. And Hillary sits there in her pew, looking with that blank stare toward the podium as the benediction is given, plotting her next move. Bill is by her side, holding her hand tight, the two of them reminding us of Pinky and the Brain. Except in this universe, instead of the Brain taking over the world, she lets Pinky rule it for 8 years instead, with the agreement that after Pinky's turn, then she would have her shot. And it all goes so well until Pinky goes to South Carolina and starts talking about fairy tales and Jesse Jackson and it goes all to hell.
Guilty by association. Does that make Hillary Clinton guilty of lying to the American people because her husband received a blow job from an intern in the White House and lied to the American people? Seriously. Does it? I don't think so. How's that any different than Barack Obama attending Pastor Wright's church? Some people might say that it’s because Bill and Hillary are married. How is that supposed to make things any better? Everyone knows the longer you live with something, the more like those things you become. I'm one dead mouse away from turning into my cats for God's sake. According to Christian theology, the Church is supposed to be just as important an institution as marriage. And if I wasn't so lazy, I'm sure I could find a quote from St. Thomas Aquinas to back me up on that.
And don't get me started on John McCain. If you think Pastor Wright is a problem, then apparently you haven't seen the crazies that John McCain has been parading about. These are the kinds of people that make your jaw drop. They talk all kinds of crazy stuff. Harry Potter's possessed by the devil, Hurricane Katrina was caused by the sins of New Orleans; George Bush is a good President, etc. It’s like the end of the first Ghostbusters movie, where the guy from the EPA played the bad guy and let all of the ghosts out. But instead of the guy from the EPA, its Pat Robertson, and instead of ghosts, it’s a cavalcade of the evangelical right, spewing hate speech that makes Pastor Wright look tame by comparison. All jokes aside, McCain's going to end up wishing he'd left the Jesus genie in the damned lamp.
My hands are getting tired, so I think I'll end it here. Its dark out and the crickets are chirping in the woods outside my back door. It’s a cool night here, and you can smell spring coming on. In a bowling alley in Truth or Consequences, NM, John McCain is giving a speech to a group of people who look like the cast of Cocoon. Somewhere Barack Obama is giving a speech to a crowd of adoring supports, near cocky in his knowledge that they would burn the ground for him if he just asked. And somewhere Bill and Hillary Clinton are sitting on a porch swing, taking in the cool night air.
"What are we going to do tonight Hillary?" Bill says.
"The same thing we do every night Bill. Try to take over the world."