You know who I'm talking about. Yes, you -- Visigoths, Ostrogoths, Franks, Angles, Saxons and Vandals (the Jutes are jerks, I don't want to include them). You think you are just sooo great because you took over your little fiefdoms after the Fall of the Roman Empire. Big whoop. Sure, sure -- you guys eventually traded your paganism for Christianity -- but we all know that was a power grab. No one actually believes you went to church while pillaging and burning.
Fine you guys built some monastaries, wrote manuscripts, built Romanesque cathedrals out of stone -- but what have you done for me lately?
Yeah, yeah, you managed to get through the 7th century without killing everyone but, man, you just couldn't seem to get your act together after you got your stuff, your piece of the pie. You just sat on your asses until the 11th century and watched the next generation squabble over the leftovers.
So, guess what? You left my generation with your shit to clean up. Do you think we would have spent a mazillion pounds of gold, jewels and pretty wenches on those frigging Crusades if you hadn't wussed out and converted to Catholicism? I don't think so. If you had done just one little bit about preparing us for urban development, do you think we would have ended up with buboes in our armpits from the Plague??? I DON'T THINK SO.
Well, guess what, you arrogant SOBs, we managed without your help. We figured out how to create universities, publish literature, invent stuff like spectacles; improve technology like artesian wells, compasses, astrolabes and clocks. Our Islamic buddies blossomed without you and guess what, jerks -- they figured out a number system that was a hell of a lot easier than Roman numerals.
If you Early Middle Agers had taken some time out from rampaging and discovered something like, hmmm, penicilin or Midol -- Petrach, Boccaccio and I wouldn't be laughing our asses off at you pathetic old farts.
Fine, take credit for changing the Western European map -- if that makes you happy. But remember, you haven't done squat for us since 1002. We had to pick up the pieces of your screw ups and try to put our countries back in order. Thanks a lot, assholes.