On a day when Obama begins the rollbackof Bush era suppression of science, it's worth remembering WHY we need a National Science Day. August 11, 1999, the day the Kansas School Board elevated "scientific creationism" to be taught in Kansas Schools. A satiric look back:
"On August 11, 1999, the Kansas Board of Education rejected evolution as a
scientific principle -- a precedent that, for Marduk's sake, other states will hopefully follow.
The 10-member board, ignoring pleas by elitist educators and faithless scientists, voted six to four to embrace new standards for science curricula that eliminate evolution as an underlying principle of biology and other sciences.
"However, only a fool would believe in evolution, and I welcome the decision handed down by the Kansas Board of Education," said Scott Hill a farmer, board member and Babylonian priest who helped write the new standards. "It's a step forward. We're going to improve rather than detract from science education in Kansas. Children will learn of the great cockle-shell that created our magnificent world!"
Dinosaur fossils, Taung Child, Peking Man, carbon dating, and 99% shared DNA with chimpanzees. Proponents of evolution hold them up as undeniable proof that not only has the world existed for millions of years, but during that time period, humans evolved considerably. Creationists maintain that a supreme being created humans in his likeness, and it was not a mere slight of nature's hand that we are what we are.
"There's a liberal agenda to build up or glorify evolution in our schools. Why is The Origin of the Species taught in schools when the holy Enuma Elish is overlooked? Evolution is a theory that is presented as fact, and our theory is just as good as any," Hill added.
"It's deception," said Tom Willis, director of the Babylonian Creation Science Association for Mid-America, which helped write the new standards. "You can't go into the laboratory or the field and make the first fish. When you tell students that science has determined (evolution to be true), you're deceiving them. What we're saying is that there had to be something to create the world around us. It didn't just appear. Something cannot come from nothing. There has to be a greater force guiding it, and that force is obviously Marduk, whom I hail by his fifty names."
America's children are routinely experimented on with liberal dogma, and they must learn the truth about the creation of the human race. Our existence on this planet stems not from macroevolution but from a heroic battle the god Marduk fought against the weak-willed goddess Tiamat.
We are told to remember the names of Marduk , for rulers will recite them, wise men and sages debate them, father to son repeat them, even shepherds and herdsmen shall hear them. Men shall rejoice in Marduk. He is the he prince of the gods. Man and earth will prosper, for his rule is strong, his command is firm. Praise be, Marduk!
This is our history. Embrace it. The Kansas Board of Education did the right thing. Evolution is a myth perpetuated by the minions of Apsu. The Enuma Elish is truth, and the truth will set you free. Marduk, Son of the Sun, is ruler of the universe, and we must worship him as such. It is blasphemous to accept anything less."
When the standard creationist references to the bible and God are changed and references to Babylonian religion are substituted for Christianity, the absurdity of proposing religion as science becomes positively stunning!
Kansas has gone back and forth since then, but ten years later we are just digging out from the ruins of banning science from our classrooms and from corridors of power inside the White House.
We will literally not survive as a species if ignorance of science is allowed to permeate our schools, and ignoring sound and impartial scientific evidence is allowed block sound public policy in our government.