Well, today the Dog became a statistic. After nine years at my company, after projects which returned over $4 million a year in bottom line dollars, the company decided that I was not valuable enough to keep around anymore. It is not like the Dog did not know things were bad, they were. Sales were off by 30% across the board and there had been a 10% reduction in workforce just three months ago.
Still, you kind of expect some level of loyalty from a company you busted your ass to make money for. That said there is no dammed use crying over spilt milk. The Dog is just one of 100 people who are coming into work today to find out they have a very, very long weekend in front of them. We got a decent severance package, one week of pay for every year of service, two months of COBRA paid for by the company and a nice one line letter explaining to whoever cares that we were let go for downsizing reasons not for any kind of disciplinary reason.
There are times when you have fantasies about what you would say if this ever happens so you, things like that line from Broadcast News where the exec letting a veteran newsman go says "Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you" and the guy replies "Well, I hope you’ll die real soon" but even though the Dog knew his boss was the one that made the call, the hound is just too much of a politician to burn any bridges. The Dog was courteous, mildly funny and more than a little shell shocked.
But that is now the past, it is history along with Julius Caesar and the next thing to do is get a job. So, Kossacks, does anyone have any lines on jobs for 6 Sigma Black Belts? I am certified by Caterpillar in DMAIC, DMEDI, and Caterpillar Production System. I hold a Change Agent certificate from La Marsh and have 4 years of running transactional projects for a Caterpillar dealership. I develop and deliver training for all levels of 6 Sigma for a billion dollar company. Basically if you have systems that need improving I have the skills in team building, communication, and process to get the job done. I am willing to move anywhere in the nation, assuming the money is right. Anyone who have any thing please send it to my public e-mail, you can find it in my profile.
UPDATE:
Okay, so this is the problem with too much industry jargon. The above is my brag on my skill set. I am a project manager who specializes in process improvement. I use my knowledge of 6 Sigma, which is a structured methodology for process improvement, to lead teams from any area in a company to improve a process. I have really strong communication skills, written and verbal. I am trained in Change Management, which is the skill of addressing resistance to change in an organization and developing ways to overcome it and gain acceptance of the change from the organization. I have statistical analysis skills for analyzing data and testing solution prior to implementation. I have worked directly for the executive committee and understand how to prioritize both risk and benefit before deploying process changes. Hopefully that is a little clearer.
Any thoughts, leads, suggestions or anything else is greatly appreciated. Today sucks, there is no getting around that, but the Dog is not a mopper or a one to wait, so it is time to get his paws on the case and get a new gig.
The floor is yours.
Update 2: You People Rock! Thanks so much for all the support and ideas. This is why this place is a community and not just a blog.