Yes, I know the Duke of Gloucester was nasty man. Sure, he killed a bunch of people including two kids to become king, but come on, he had a great monologue thanks to that guy that came after me who wrote a couple of decent plays and maybe three good poems.
If you continue reading, you will find the homicidal maniac actual had something good to say about Health Care Reform.
Now is the autumn of our discontent
Made miserable winter by these sons of guns;
And all the clouds that lour'd upon the Senate
In the deep bosom of the Insurance Industry buried.
Now are our brows bound with withered wreaths;
Our bruised arms hung up for monuments;
Our stern alarums about closed door meetings,
Our dreadful marches against crooked measures.
Grim-visaged war hath increased Baucus’s wrinkled front;
And now, coupled with mounting bullshit screeds
To fright the souls of fearful adversaries,
Republicans caper nimbly in a lady's chamber
To the lascivious pleasing of a lute.
But I, that am not shaped for scum-bag tricks,
Nor made to court a shit load of lobbyists;
I, that am rudely stamp'd, and want justice’s majesty
To strut before a wanton ambling Congress;
I, that am curtail'd of this fair proportion,
Cheated of health care by dissembling politicians,
Sick, uninsured, sent before my time
Into the emergency room, scarce income, no coverage,
And that so lamely and debilitated
That blue dogs bark at me as I plead to them;
Why, I, in this weak piping time of chaos,
Have no delight to pass away the time,
Unless to spy my shadow in the sun
And descant on mine own deformity:
And therefore, since I cannot prove a voice in my government,
To plead with these unfair, corrupt poseurs,
I am determined to prove a villain
And hate the idle pleasures of these asses.
Plots have I laid, inductions dangerous,
By drunken prophecies, libels and dreams,
To set the blue dogs and republicans
In deadly hate the one against the other:
And if Congress be as untrue and heartless
As I am subtle, firm and relentless,
This day should health care reform be amped up,
About a public option, which says that 'G'
Of Chaucer’s heirs the victor shall be.
For those of you who are purists, the above rant was actually the first draft of the self-employed writer of decent drama. His unfortunate second draft can be found here.