A few of you have noticed that I haven't been writing much here lately. There are a myriad of reasons for that - one has to do with life and work and obligations. Another one has to do with a general sense that I could learn more by reading and didn't have much to add to the conversation, particularly on healthcare reform.
But the big reason had to do with one two-minute video clip (which I can't find right now - sorry) from a tea party town hall in (I think) Texas. It shook my faith in humanity. My hope started to erode, and thinking about whether or not anything meaningful could be accomplished was seriously jeopardized.
Much more over the fold.
The town hall I reference was tea party friendly. In other words, the Representative - I believe it was a woman - was full bore on the anti-healthcare reform and the crowd was absolutely stuffed with anti-healthcare reform "friendlies". It was a hostile environment for anyone with even a limited amount of curiosity about the real potential and benefit of healthcare reform.
In the midst of that shouting, gnashing crowd, a young woman arose and lined up to ask a question. She took her place in front of the microphone as her turn arrived. She was quite young - early 20's at best - and she held her two-year old son. She came to the microphone and said something to this effect (I have to paraphrase because I don't have a transcript):
I'm a waitress. I work six days a week. My son has healthcare because of the children's healthcare legislation - but I can't afford it. No matter how much I work, I can't afford it. So I would like to know if anything can be done to help people like me.
In the months since she stood up and asked that - and she wasn't shrill - I have admired the sheer, raw courage it took for her to do that. Not only was she clearly in a hostile crowd - but she basically verbally prostrated herself and said that she needed help. It was, to me, one of the bravest things I've ever seen.
And then, another woman - a member of the crowd, not the representative - stood up from her seat and took the microphone from an aide and said (again, paraphrased):
I'm sorry. But I don't feel responsible for paying for your mistakes.
The applause was uproarious. My jaw fell open. Her mistakes? Which mistakes were those? The mistake of her beautiful son? The mistake of her inability to get a better paying job? The mistake of being young, working hard, and not making very much money?
The sheer disdain and lack of care that the second woman showed was appalling. And I thought to myself - "they're ALL like this". Fuck you if you can't afford healthcare. Fuck you if you think that I somehow should give up some of my money to help you. Fuck you utterly.
It was disgusting. That woman was disgusting and hateful. And as much as I dislike the more shrill people on the other side of the political spectrum, I have NEVER wished devastation or come-uppance on them. "There but for the grace of God go I", I think - or, if you prefer, "Karma's a bitch." But I wished badness on that hateful woman. I wished some terrible tragedy on her such that she had to baldly turn to others for help, and then I wished her requests be refused with cries of "I'm not responsible for your mistakes." I wished that she watch as her neighbors happily purchased flat screen TVs and ignored her plight, her need.
I hate that I thought that.
This diary isn't about healthcare reform, or about that brave young woman, or about the hateful woman who rebuffed and attempted to humiliate her. It's about Afghanistan.
I don't want to be that hateful woman. I don't want to march into Afghanistan, turn it upside down, bomb it, kill it's people, and then abandon it. I don't want to promise a better life - education for girls where they are free from having acid thrown in their face as they walk to school, better conditions for women generally, improved literacy and education, and a more forgiving way of life - and then shrug my shoulders and say "Too hard, too risky. It's not my responsibility."
Despite what many think here and have typed and posted and shouted about here, there ARE people in Afghanistan - as human as you and I, as vulnerable as that young woman at that town hall - who not only need but WANT our help. They don't want us to pick up a microphone and tell them that they're not our responsibility. Because you know what? On more than one serious levels, it IS.
So for me - pulling troops out utterly - tatamount to "Fuck you utterly, you piece of shit" is NOT an option. But we're also not being successful with the troop levels where they are. So I'm willing to support a buildup with the hope of delivering on our responsibility and THEN getting the fuck out of there. So many have said that the world's on its head if we think that sending MORE means that, at some future point, we can draw down to less and less and then none. But you know what? Sometimes, when you go to break down a door or move a piece of furniture, the people you have simply can't get it done. So you can either leave the furniture where it is or leave that door standing (despite the fire raging in the house and people you need to save) - OR you can get more people, break that fucking door down, and get the job done.
Just so everyone knows - I'm deeply conflicted over Afghanistan. But I do trust this President. I trust his intellect and his sense of responsibility. And I'm willing to trust him a bit longer on this issue.
At least think about it. And now, flame away.