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I am your neighbor, your mail carrier, your cable repairman, your grocer, your hairstylist, your cousin's best friend, your daughter's playdate, your mother's podiatrist, your Chinese food delivery boy.

I am the poor, the disenfranchised, the scared, the minority, the illegal.

And I am not nearly as stupid as you think I am.

Just because you spout the Politics of Hate, and mistakenly call yourselves a "major political party" in America, don't think I can't see right through you. I can.

You can go fuck yourselves. Sideways. And you might as well use that stick up your ass to do it.

You can go fuck yourselves for that Jim Crow-esque new law in Arizona. I cannot even believe that shit. You really expect people like me to think that you're not racist, apartheid-starting dickheads? Do you think I'm EVER going to travel to Arizona now? Btw, thanks a bunch for scaring the bejesus out of my girlfriend's extended family; they're planning to move to New Mexico next week because of this illegal new law. Honorable mention to Sheriff Joe Arpaio for making the political environment crumble enough so that Arizona could pass this absolute piece of crap.

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for all that violent rhetoric that keeps making the nightly news. You keep shutting down congressional offices, throwing bricks through windows, spitting on congresspeoples, sending talcum powder to congresspeoples, hurling racist and homophobic epithets at congresspeoples, comparing President Obama to Adolf Hitler, planning to kill a bunch of cops, doing your damndest to make Roe v. Wade obsolete, attempting to destroy IRS buildings and personnel, hating on Teh Gay, denying global warming, threatening armed revolution, misspelling woefully misguided picket signs, refusing to get your facts straight, and intimidating everyone who doesn't share your twisted worldview.

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for your lack of journalistic integrity. You give a very large microphone to straight-up xenophobes such as Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Michael Savage, Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Erick Erickson, and Lou Dobbs. As if that weren't enough, the "mainstream media" then echoes these pathetic, small-minded voices by giving legitimacy to elected fuck-ups like Michele Bachmann, Steve King, Tom Tancredo, Tom Coburn, James Inhofe, Jim DeMint, Jeff Sessions, Rick Perry, Virginia Foxx, Haley Barbour, Bob McDonnell, Ken Cuccinelli, and Sarah Palin.

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for legalizing torture. You began illegal detentions, wrote and passed The Patriot Act (both 1 and 2), caused Abu Ghraib, increased black sites all over the world, instituted spying on American citizens, outted a CIA agent you had a vendetta against, penalized whistle blowers, increased executive power exponentially, started two God-forsaken and unnecessary wars, and pissed off the entire world. You are George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Karl Rove, Don Rumsfeld, John Ashcroft, Condoleezza Rice, Alberto Gonzales, John Yoo, Jay Bybee, Richard Perle, Scooter Libby, John Roberts, Samuel Alito, Antonin Scalia, Clarence Thomas, L. Paul Bremer, George Tenet, and Porter Goss.

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for letting folks in New Orleans die while you sat on your asses and ate some cake. I was embarrassed to call myself an American after that, you bastards. How dare you not pay attention to human suffering under your watch? How dare you make a mockery of our government and our country? How dare you show your faces in public after you left NOLA hanging for 5 fucking days?!

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for wrecking the world's economy and then blaming it on Barack Obama. We probably would have had some cash-on-hand if you hadn't occupied two sovereign nations, you stupid, vindictive asshats.

Fuck you.

You can go fuck yourselves for making the United States of America, and our concept of democracy, a cruel joke. You want to hurt people who are not like you, who are "the other", who scare you, who give you someone to blame for our Huge Pile of Fail™ that is the current state of the nation. Stop blaming us. We didn't pull any of this shit! We didn't run the country into the ever-loving ground for 8 solid years! We didn't say we were Christians on the one hand, and then hate with all our might on the other! We're not the reason you lost your job! We're not the reason for your daddy issues! We're not the reason for you not getting laid!

SO FUCK YOU!

If you're looking for someone to blame, check-out a goddamned mirror, you fucking fucks!

-----

UPDATE I: From the glorious Steveningen, in the comments:

Here's a few ways to tell the GOP "FUCK YOU" with an international flair:

Putang Ina - Philipines
Neuk Jou - Netherlands
Cai deo gi day - Vietnam
Chodela - Hindi
Dorme Mecum - Latin
Kisama - Japan
Vas te faire encule - France
Pishov na khuj - Ukraine
Foda-se - Brazil
Yoaashur - Arabic
Kefe - Samoa

Next week:  Kiss my hairy gay ass

: )

-----

UPDATE II: If you want a strong action diary, please go here!

Originally posted to I don't think you're ready for this jelly. on Sat Apr 24, 2010 at 10:38 AM PDT.

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