As a life-long Republican, it has been my pleasure to watch President Obama's various missteps and challenges over the last few weeks. Every day he seems to prove in a new way that only Republicans have what it takes to run this country. The most recent example? Obama's nomination of Elena Kagan to the Supreme Court.
I mean, get real--here's a woman who's never been a judge! What qualifications does she have to serve? A couple of decades of top-flight legal experience? Come on. This was almost as ridiculous as when that other guy nominated the friend he chose to head his search committee. Kagan is clearly Obama's Harriet Miers.
Let's talk about a few other things...
Obama's Katrina
This BP spill is the biggest disaster this country has faced since the 2005 hurricane that devastated the Gulf Coast. Admittedly, the Obama administration's response has been fairly aggressive, and we haven't seen anyone begging for helicopter rescue from the rooftops yet, but come on. I think we've got all the proof we need that Barack Obama doesn't care about sea turtles. It's almost as bad as when that other guy dicked around on his ranch while Katrina bore down on New Orleans.
Obama's Social Security Privatization
Okay, this title's not as catchy, but still. Obama overhauled our entitlement programs against all public opinion, it's just like when that other guy tried to privatize social security. Okay, Obama's push reduced the deficit instead of expanding it, and it expanded the role of government in protecting people's welfare instead of reducing it, and it actually got passed instead of just making him a lame-duck a year into his term. But, still.
Obama's Iraq War
Okay, technically that other guy started the War in Afghanistan, but we can all agree that it's Obama's now, right? Right. So the War in Afghanistan is exactly like the war that other guy started in Iraq, except for the lying and the they-never-attacked-us and the "he-tried-to-kill-my-dad" stuff. But it's gonna be a mess, so I think we might as well just go ahead and round it up to an Iraq.
Obama's Failed Foreign Policy
Remember when that other guy got the rest of the world all ticked off at the USA by handing out smart bombs and awkward back-rubs like a dentist hands out sugar-free candy? Well, I'm pretty sure Obama hasn't had one romantic stroll with Saudi Royalty yet, so he's clearly not doing us any favors abroad.
Obama's Pretzel Incident
Did you see Obama's NCAA Bracket? What a maroon. You'd almost think he was the kind of dumbass who can't chew a pretzel.
Obama's 9/11
Okay, he hasn't had one of these yet. Maybe the underwear-bomber could be his shoe-bomber, or the Times Square Plot could be his... umm, that Library Tower plot or something. It doesn't matter, the point is we've got to figure out something, because 9/11 was a huge, horrible disaster and a total failure of our government to protect the Homeland. And we really need to remind people that that kind of thing only happens to Democrats. You know, like that other guy.