I include the word 'mitigation' in the title, because the term 'cleanup' is often being used to refer to what is done after the gusher has been smothered. I see no reason to wait. By the estimates of actual scientists, there's about 4 million gallons of crud going into the water every day. And we need to be doing something for an estimated two additional months.
I can't make the relief well drilling go any faster. I can't stop BP and the U.S. military from spraying a deluge of poison called "dispersant". I can't bring in a supertanker and slurp up oil off the surface. I can't manufacture an oil corral. And it seems to me that neither BP nor the federal and state governments are trying to actually clean up the oil out in the Gulf of Mexico. What can I do?
One in a million. The idea of using hay is something that can be done by giant tankers and special skimmers, by repurposed military ships, by shrimp boats. And by individuals. But one person is immediately overwhelmed by the magnitude of the disaster. So I think of myself as being part of a (currently imaginary) army of a million independently operating individuals. Think The World of Null-A. If I were one of a million people taking action, that's only 4 gallons a day that I need to remove. With all the crud already in the water, let's push it up to 5, to gradually remove what's been allowed to build up. How can I remove my 5 gallons per day? With a small boat and some hay. Here's a very ad-hoc "action plan".
- Acquire the following tools: a small boat, a bale of hay, a 5-gallon open container (preferably a tub)), a pitchfork, and the biggest wire mesh skimmer I can find. It would also be a good idea to get a hazmat suit with a mask that would block most of the fumes.
- Fill the tub with hay.
- Put in somewhere off Louisiana and go out until you encounter oil.
- Throw in the hay.
- Stir it up with the pitchfork.
- Pull it back in, initially with the pitchfork, then with the skimmer.
- Go back to land.
- Dump the tub in front of the office of a BP executive or a corporatist deregulating politician. (What would I do with it?)
I'm not really sure what this will cost. The biggest up front cost will be buying a small boat; I don't think anyone's going to want to rent one for this purpose. I certainly wouldn't. I'm thinking about a 16-foot power boat. I don't know how far out such a boat could safely go, I'm just assuming. With the oil already rolling in, I might be able to just use a Jon boat. Or even dump the straw on shore. Well, at least the cost can be thought of as being amortized over two months. The daily costs would consist of gas for the boat and car, plus lodgings.
The 4-gallon figure is, I'm hoping, far less than could actually be removed. I wonder if it could be done by a mere 100,000 people?
If there's already an organization that's assisting with this type of effort, someone point me in their direction. Of course, I'll be happy to listen to suggestions, and warnings. Meanwhile, I'm getting started.
Think this is ridiculous? A million small boats all trying to get up oil? Imagine the traffic nightmare, on land and in the water. No, what it is, is desperation. I'd like to see something happen with Kevin Costner's Ocean Therapy contraptions, and I think using a shrimp boat would be a good idea, but I'm sick of waiting on someone else, and sick at what I'm seeing. It's like watching the guy in the black hat shoot the guy in the white hat. Over and over and over.
P.S. I'm not working, so one thing I have a good supply of is time. What I don't have is anything more than a relatively irrelevant amount of money.