I've taken medication for depression and anxiety for about 30 years. It's hereditary...my mother suffers from the same disorder, and her father was institutionalized for mental problems many years ago also. Grandpa had electro shock therapy years ago and came out like a zombie. The state of Michigan put Mom in a 'home' last year because they said she's schizophrenic and no longer competent to care for herself. My current situation has me worried and I need to rant...so here goes.
I am a 55 year old female, unemployed for over 2 1/2 years, uninsured and already owe for past medical services. I have a pacemaker, high blood pressure, depression, anxiety, chronic back pain from herniated discs and bone spurs, insomnia, fibromyalgia and joint pain. I need help, but I can't find anywhere to turn. I don't want to call 911 or the suicide line. I need medications and I need a pacemaker check. Is there any help for me? It's almost 4:30 a.m. again, and I'm in pain and crying tears and depressed and tired of feeling like this. I can't pay...so I just suffer. I've worked for over 35 years...yep, we have a healthcare system that sucks. I don't qualify for any assistance in our great state of Missouri. No Medicare/Medicaid...nothing. I can't even get a free pacemaker check. I'll just wait for my heart to quit, but I hope my mind holds out until then.
I've applied for SSDI, but I received the usual rejection letter. I'll appeal, but that will probably take years. What can a person do? I know I'm not alone in needing help and I don't want to whine and look for pity. I just want to slap Rush Limbaugh and Glen Beck and all the stupid idiots that think people DON'T deserve healthcare.
I'm tired of hearing the U.S. is the greatest nation...we are the greatest hypocrits. I'm getting more paranoid of the powers that control our lives as I get older. I don't want to end up like Mom, locked up with a bunch of invalids that can't care for themselves. She likes to play cards and she still gets around well, but she stays in her room at the nursing home with the door closed. "I don't like the smell of urine", she tells me, when I ask why she sits in her room with her door closed. She could still be living in her home if Medicaid would have allowed her some home care.
Lock them up...that's the new cure for what ails us. I know too many people who have ended up that way. The U.S. locks up more people than any other nation. Jails, institutions, hospitals, and nursing homes are big business. Mental and physical health issues keep many people from being productive citizens. Die quick Americans, or you too could end up incarcerated.