Quick note: I'm in a hurry so didn't have a lot of time to spend on this. Still, the linked article is pretty funny in it's awesome lameness.
----
This "exclusive" is so fucking stupid that I'm not sure what to say.
EXCLUSIVE: 'BMWs' Help Afghans Go AWOL From Texas Air Base
BMWs, in this case, refers to "Big Mexican Women." Now, I don't live in San Antonio, but I am assuming that BMW is a generic term used by the military to describe a type of woman you might meet at a bar. Fox News would have you believe it's a suspicious network of "possibly" illegal aliens.
A loose network of Mexican-American women, some of whom may be illegal immigrants, have been responsible for helping numerous Afghan military deserters go AWOL from an Air Force Base in Texas, FoxNews.com has learned.
In other words, FoxNews.com doesn't have proof, but why let a good opportunity to pile on the immigration issue go to waste?
The Afghan deserters refer to the women as "BMWs" — Big Mexican Women — and they often are the first step in the Afghans' journey from Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio, Texas, to Canada, a diplomatic official told FoxNews.com.
Okay, hold this thought for a second. The Afghan deserters refer to the women as BMWs. Just the Afghan deserters, right. Because, if so, I am impressed they learned English so quickly and have learned to make such clever use of acronyms so cleverly.
The official's account was supported by a source at the Defense Language Institute (DLI), who also requested anonymity. Foreign soldiers attend DLI to learn English before they receive specialized military training at various installations in the U.S.
Uh huh. FoxNews.com, you are so totally unfuckingbelieveable. The way you add these little snippets to skew the thinking of those who aren't paying attention is just, well, mmmwhhaa!
The Afghan military men usually meet the women at three nightclubs in San Antonio, according to the DLI source, who accompanied some of the men to these locations and has been privy to discussions among them about the establishments and the women.
Um, so why was the source there? To escort the men or perhaps to test drive a BMW?
The nightclubs include two military hangouts — Tiffany’s Cocktails and Mirage, located outside Lackland's main gate — and Graham Central Station, a massive warehouse-like building in downtown San Antonio that houses "six nightclubs under one roof" that host a variety of theme nights. Photos on Graham Central's website show scantily clad women rolling around in what appears to be Jell-O.
I don't have anything to add to this, I just thought it was funny they included that fact.
But here's the final turd in the pile of shit that is this FoxNews.com article -
Another student, Bahram Mohmand, described by friends as the most unlikely of the 46 to go AWOL, decided at the very last minute not to go home. A pilot with two wives and more than a dozen children, he failed his final exam and felt too humiliated to face his family, the sources said. He vanished in March, and the sources said he could not have gotten away from Lackland without help.
"It must have been a BMW, because he had no money," a source said. "He was not planning this. He made a stupid, stupid decision because he was afraid to go home a failure. He could not do this without help."
First of all, who the fuck are these sources? Secondly, was this particular source an Afghan deserter? I only ask because they're the ones that call them BMWs.