URP President Obama came out swinging yesterday, declaring “I’ve had it with the Republicans. They’ve done absolutely nothing but stonewall initiatives to get people to work and propose nonsensical legislation that distracts from the importance of getting Americans back to work!” Signaling his desire to work closely with Democratic leaders in the House and the Senate, Obama has started meeting with committee chairs and ranking members to implement aggressive outreach programs and media communication strategies to highlight Democratic approaches to America’s problems.
“This is very exciting stuff,” said Al Franken (D-MN). “We are asserting our position as defenders of the American people, pushing hard against the Republican juggernaut of media lies and distractions. We’ve put together news releases bashing Republican outrages in states like Wisconsin, Ohio, and Michigan. We’ve bought full-page ads in all the major news markets encouraging people to support local Democratic initiatives and calling out conservatives on their heartless positions. We're booked solid for the next 3 months on all the Sunday talk shows. Meetings with labor leaders have been extremely productive in getting talking points out to local chapter leaders and rank-and-file members. It’s going to be absolutely overwhelming when this stuff hits the streets!”
Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid is eagerly looking forward to changing the legislative agenda. “We are going to play hardball with the Republicans, using every rule and trick in the book to quash their agenda, reverse their momentum, and push our legislative programs through the Congress. We’ve learned a lot from the Republicans on how to play the offensive while in the minority and they are going to wish they never opened that Pandora’s box! Nancy and I are strong-arming our caucus to get wayward Democrats in line. It’s amazing how much movement you can get when you threaten their re-election support."
“I have to say that I’m worried,” reported Karl Rove, former advisor to President Bush. “This is a level of response that I didn’t think we would ever see from the Democrat Party. It’s quite disturbing. This could completely negate our gains over the last two years and seriously compromise our positioning for the 2012 elections. We’re going to have to carefully assess our current strategies with our corporate benefactors and consider realigning our political priorities.”