God Forbid!!!
I've been thinking about The Donald's very excellent adventure from last night. He entered last night's festivities displaying such braggadocio, I could almost see him preening! From his first second on camera, I immediately thought, "he thinks the President doesn't know he is going to be there"! Donald Trump specifically went to that affair to show his power over our President, did he expect Barack to cower?
After the last week, I would have handled last night so differently!
First, I would have immediately called the best stylist in New York and got a haircut. Not just any haircut, but the sexy Sean Connery haircut, Granted his head is big and square, and he couldn't in his finest hour resemble Sean, but it's a start.
Secondly, I would have dyed my hair a nice Mitt Romney brown with flecks of grey. That color has got to go!
Thirdly, I would have fired the entourage, nothing says "I wanna be a king" like a fawning entourage following him around. One or two well-placed assistants and he could have pretended to be presidential and even likable.
Fourth, a speech coach, stupid! Don't lose the accent, but I find Anthony Weiner's voice extremely sexy, The Donald - not so much (barf).
Now, none of us would be fooled by this, but republicans would have immediately swallowed hook, line and sinker. They so want to love this guy, in fact, most of them love him just the way he is, a pompous, racist, nasty, vulgar bully (he speaks their language). But, if he adjusted his entire persona last night, well, we all know the things republican bosses can forgive, IOKIYAR. They would have quickly espoused him and he would be their darling.
The fifth and final thing I would have done, after making sure I no longer looked like a clown, would be to learn how to laugh. Some of those jokes wouldn't have been very funny anymore, could you imagine if Seth walked in the room and saw my improved version of Trump, lol. I still doubt Seth would have had a problem adjusting, he is a comic genius.
And "the laugh" is so important! Just watching Barack laugh makes me laugh, he is so genuine. I would have hired an actor to teach me to laugh, think Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman", totally spontaneous and believable. And then I would have practiced being insulted and finding the joke and laughing as hard as everyone else.
Yes, The Donald blew it last night (well no, he blew it immediately the day he opened his mouth). He had a choice, and he did not choose Presidential! One of the highlights of the night was watching him stalk out, all angry and red.
Can you tell that I really don't want to lose the spectacle of The Donald, there is so much more fun to be had. And, if I remember correctly, it's The Donald's turn to produce some records, financials anyone?