I'm not a violent man. "Thank God" I've been lucky enough not to have been involved in any kind of physical or violent altercation in all of my adult life. But growing up, it was a little different, and I'm also grateful for that, because of the lessons I learned.
I've known many people who talk about the emotional scars they carry as the result of being victims of bullying in their formative years. More often than not what I've found is that what they regret the most is not having had the POWER or the ability to defend themselves. My take is that that sense of vulnerability and impotence does more long-term emotional damage than the actual slap in the face, or push against the wall.
And I think I would know. Aside from the occasional black eye, or chipped tooth, or bruised knuckles, which by now have healed and don't even register in my "emotional" radar, what I do remember the most (fondly) is the reaction of a bully when knocked on his back after an unexpected strike right in the face.
Those tough formative years taught me a lot of lessons. Lessons I would use during my entire adult life (in a non-violent way), and lessons which I think apply to understanding the concept of raw POWER.
I'm not going to dwell on the topic of violence (which I've seen a lot of), other than to say that in any serious confrontational situation, physical violence can be the result when all other options have been tried. Through the years I also learned that even in a violent society, physical confrontations are rare. And that's because most people have an interest in self-preservation, and once you get into a physical confrontation, no matter how bad-ass you are, you really don't know the outcome. You could get hurt. You could hurt someone else and go to jail, etc.
But having been exposed to violence was instructive in a way, because it allowed me to understand the full range of possible outcomes during confrontations, and thus it helped demystify it.
As anybody knows, unfortunately, bullying is not something only kids do. It goes on everywhere, although in a little more sophisticated way (not punches or pushing around). So again, my greatest memories have been when I've been in different situations when a loud-mouth bully starts being verbally abusive or try to intimidate. And this happen even in corporate environments (where I've worked as well).
Usually bullies are used to getting away with their behavior and that's why they keep doing it. And that's why when they are confronted head on, they are just taken aback.
Don't get me wrong... I'm very conciliatory and very (extremely) patient. I don't lose my temper, or walk around with a chip on my shoulder. But when I've found it necessary, I have no problem (verbally) stopping somebody cold in their tracks when I determine they are exhibiting bullying behavior (I understand that's subjective). And again, being at a high-stakes business-type meeting and calmly but firmly putting a bully in their place: Priceless!
Of course, I've found that the reason a lot of people don't do this is because of fear. They fear getting in trouble (at work), or retaliation, and even a physical confrontation. And obviously, those are all legitimate considerations. I've just chosen to put those considerations aside and stand up against bullies (in those very rare occasions when the behavior is egregious). I'm glad I have, but I don't blame anybody for not choosing to do that, because there are risks involved (of course).
Power and Politics
How does this applies to politics? Well, here's the key thing to understand: In order to move your agenda forward you need political power. That's a very simple concept.
In a democratic society you typically gain power through an election process. As long as that process is clean and fair, then participating in an election process should be sufficient to try to get the power you need to move your agenda forward (along with civic participation).
But also, understand one thing. POWER in itself is amoral. It just is. You either have it or not. Then the issue is: Once you have it, what do you do with it? Then you enter into the area of ethics and morality.
We are not living in a normal democratic system, under the rule of law. The entire political system has been corrupted. The rich and powerful are committing crimes with impunity (a sure sign of a rapid decline towards a Banana Republic-type situation), and under the protection of their bought-off government (both major political parties). This system is in the process of subjugating you and exploiting you, and enslaving you. It has turned into a criminal (increasingly oppressive) system.
Now, under this reality, think about what is it that you want to do if you had power. You want to live in a society governed by the rule of law. A society that respects the U.S. constitution, goes to war only at a last resort (and not because of powerful war-profiteering interests). A society with a true free market economy, and not a criminal (corporatist) Kleptocracy (as the one we have now).
So given this reality, and because POWER is amoral (if you accept my premise), then the key issue is it that you have to do to gain the POWER you need in order to do the right thing and help bring about a just and fair society?
If the political system is broken (and I argue that it is), then participating in the electoral system is not going to be enough because you are forced to participate in a thoroughly corrupt (and bought off) system. You still have to play within that system as a default option, but you need to understand it's limitation. Look at it as your odds when you are in Las Vegas playing against the house.
So if you (the progressive movement) want to be taken seriously, you need to understand that the first order of business is to put yourself in a position to gain POWER.
So you have to come up with strategies focus on that, whatever it takes (but stay within the law, and the Constitution).
Regardless, this is no longer an issue that calls for politeness, or restrain, or fear.
You have given the bully plenty opportunity to rethink what he's doing, to mend his ways, to come to the table and negotiate in good faith.
He ain't.
So now is time to be ruthless. After the bully has been pushing you against the wall over and over; slapping you around; laughing at you; making fun at you and calling you names; poking his finger at you...
You will only get his attention once he finds himself flat on his ass looking up at the blue sky in a daze after you have punched him straight in the face.
UNITE AND FIGHT THESE FUCKING SCUMBAGS!
I'm advocating the rise of a peaceful (but powerful) resistance movement lead by principled leaders. A movement that is highly disciplined, focused, and with staying power. These times call for such leaders. When they arise, people will follow.
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