Here's to the day that the Republicans wake up and remember that they're also Americans (with apologies to Mr. Geisel)
Mayzie The Lazy Bird hatched out a plan
"I will feather my nest the best that I can
I have figured a clever and ironclad way
To have it protected while I'm off at play!
When I'm in Cancun or Ibiza for rest
Someone else should be here! Yes, that would be best.
I need an accomplice! A foil! A tool!
This calls for a twenty-four carat gold fool!"
So, she asked her friend Horton to lend her his ear
And Horton The Elephant drew himself near
"You're strong and persuasive," the lazy bird said
"Go talk to the others! They're easily led
Get all of their nest eggs and bring them back here
I don't care if you use cajoling or fear
Hard times are afoot; a shelter is best
And no shelter’s better than my little nest!"
"I'm not really sure," the elephant sighed
"Your logic is sound; it can't be denied.
But last time you asked me to lend you a hand
You fooled me and lit out for West La-La Land!
Mayzie The Lazy Bird fluttered and fumed
"How petty to have that old chestnut exhumed!
You hold that against me?! How childish! How sick!
Apologize now! Apologize quick!"
Of course, Horton showed the resolve of a sieve
Plus, Maizie had peanuts and kind words to give
He gathered the nest eggs as quick as could be
And nestled them into her nest in the tree
"That's wonderful," said Mayzie, packing eggs in her grip
"You stick with these eggs, and I'll take my trip!"
Then, Maizie took off without saying goodbye
So laden with eggs that she struggled to fly
Mayzie's new tree was quite comfy and strong
As Horton sat down, he thought "What could go wrong?"
He put on sunglasses and a jaunty slouch hat...
And he sat...
And he sat...
And he sat...
And he sat...
Through good times and bad.. through war and through peace
Through sun and through storm Horton found no surcease
He sat through a horrible hurricane's screech
He even sat through a whole Mitt Romney speech!
He sat there all day; he sat all night long
He sat in that seat until something went wrong:
The animals gathered at Mayzie Bird's tree
And, boy! Were they angry! As mad as could be!
"Return the nest eggs that you keep on your bough!
They're ours and we need them, so give them back now!"
"Be off," Horton scoffed, "You are making a scene
I mean what I say, and I say what I mean!
Until Mayzie comes back, I refuse to relent!
I won't budge! On this point, I'm a hundred percent!"
The animals heard, and were fit to be tied
So, they shouted as one, "Horton! You're occupied!"
"You say you won't move? Then, neither shall we!
You're staying there, Horton, in Mayzie Bird's tree!
We are the many; you and Mayzie are few
What's best for the rest is good for you, too!
Get off of our nest eggs, dear Horton! Come down!
We'll square it with Mayzie when she comes around
We've meant what we said; we've said what we meant
On this we won't budge; we're one hundred percent!"
And Horton gave all of their thoughts a good think
And then asked all the birds up for a drink
“My dear friends” said Horton, “my friends, I’m afraid
That I've been hood-winked by Miss Mayzie's charade
Pretending she's honest and loyal and true
I see that she’s lazy and mean--not true blue
So, here’s my solution: Come one and come all
And sit here with me until Mayzie does call
She’s greedy and sly and she won’t give them back
She’ll take all the eggs! She’ll keep the whole stack
So here we must sit until she gives way
The eggs that you all have worked so hard to lay
I’m sorry she fooled me, she won’t yet again
I’m guarding these eggs with you ‘til the end.
She thinks she can waltz in and make us give in
But Lazy Miss Mayzie will fail yet again
And that's where it stands to this very day
Where's Lazy Mayzie? Nobody can say
Horton remains on watch in the tree
Not waiting for Mayzie, but waiting to see
If occupied birds can hatch out new eggs
They're ours now; no matter if Mayzie Bird begs
We won't cause a fight, we won’t hold a grudge
We’ll share our resolve in refusing to budge
And down on the ground, from far and from wide
Are the many surrounding him on every side
"We meant what we said and we said what we meant
It's time to rein in the top one percent!"
--shp