Skip to main content

Hi Zuck:

A big thumbs up to you and all your newly minted Facebook millionaires and billionaires.   Welcome to the Club! ... now that you’ve been anointed … with full membership and all its exclusive privileges into Club Wall Street, I’d like to invite you into what will be the biggest IPO in history.  Yes, this will be bigger …. much bigger than your IPO.  We’re not talking measly billions here … we’re talking trillions. You guessed it - the U. S. Inc. IPO is scheduled for my inauguration day 2013.  I’ve been working for months with the best and brightest in Club Wall Street to develop the offering circular. ...

Hi Zuck:

A big thumbs up to you and all your newly minted Facebook millionaires and billionaires.   Welcome to the Club!  Although, the media panned the IPO, saying Facebook didn’t live up to the hype,  we know different don’t we?  Wink.

Consider the facts.  You raised a ton of cash.   $13.5 billion is no chump change.   Your investors took their money off the table before the stock tanked and everybody on the campus got liquidity.  So what if the late comers to the party woke up with a  hangover?   That’s the way the game is played.  You created maximum hype … translated hype into cool cash …  I call that textbook execution.

Speaking of the game,  now that you’ve been anointed … with full membership and all its exclusive privileges into Club Wall Street, I’d like to invite you into what will be the biggest IPO in history.  Yes, this will be bigger …. much bigger than your IPO.  We’re not talking measly billions here … we’re talking trillions.

You guessed it - the U. S. Inc. IPO is scheduled for my inauguration day 2013.  I’ve been working for months with the best and brightest in Club Wall Street to develop the offering circular.  Imagine when the SEC and all the other regulatory bodies are working on our team, instead of  "their" team.   Imagine when we control the pursestrings of America Inc. 

Now that you know how the game works, I’m inviting a select few from Club Wall Street to get pre-IPO shares.  We’re talking about a huge opening day pop - not 10 percent, not fifty percent … we’re talking big time pop.... like the kind of pop that came off of the bat of Barry Bonds.  It’ll be the Facebook IPO on steroids.  Once I’ve rung the opening bell, January 21, 2013, we will literally own America Inc..

Since the IPO is not yet registered with the SEC, we can’t talk about it publicly, and you can’t buy any shares yet.  The only way you can reserve your allocation is by making a seven figure contribution to American Crossroads.  That’s the Super PAC that, for the record, is entirely “independent” of my campaign.  Rest assured American Crossroads is legit.   Karl Rove is the mastermind behind the whole scheme.  He’s branding the initiative as a “job creator” and make no mistake about it … we’ll be creating jobs for investment bankers like Wall Street has never seen before … Let’s just say this is just the beginning ... a whole new frontier in creative finance.  “Let the good times roll ... again.”

Speaking of just the beginning … congrats on your nuptials … the deal was very well executed … like all good deals, it was consummated in private ... away from the clique lights of public scrutiny.   You’re a quick study on this stuff.   And remember, ... after I’m elected you’ll no longer have to make due with just one wife.  After I’ve passed the new Snit Romney Polygamy law by executive order, you can have as many wives as your bank account can finance. – legally.   It’s a whole new era in marital status where marriage will be defined a union between one man and his women.  Please make checks payable to Snit Romney for President.

Sincerely yours,

Snit Romney (www.SnitRomney.org)
Repugnicant Candidate for President of the Untied States of America

Poll

Do you want in on Pre-IPO Shares of America Inc.?

12%1 votes
50%4 votes
12%1 votes
25%2 votes
0%0 votes
0%0 votes

| 8 votes | Vote | Results

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags

?

More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site