As we all know, job creators are the key to our country's economic engine.
I propose a new tax plan that will reward job creators for their unparalleled ability to create honest American jobs.
For the purpose of this plan, anyone with more than $2Million in income or more than $2Million increase in property ownership will be considered a job creator.
Job creators should not be subject to normal income tax on either earned or unearned income. Their job creation skills are too valuable to squander with burdensome taxes that are not reflective of their job creation prowess.
Instead, we should have an incentive system that allows job creators to drive their tax rates to zero based on their job creation prowess.
So I propose the following results based incentive plan be adopted by the IRS. Best described by a simple formula.
AGI = adjusted gross income according to form 1040
increase_in_ownership = last year's increase in ownership of investment accounts, bank accounts, and property subject to property tax. Mortages are not deducted because a job creator society is also an ownership society.
job_creation_abiliity = max(AGI, increase_in_ownership)
if (job_creation_ability < $2M)
you are not a job creator, pay your income taxes
otherwise
your normal income taxes are zero
special job creation taxes are calculated as below
unemployment = average unemployment rate for last year according to BLS reports
underemployment = average underemployment rate for last year according to BLS reports
marginal_attachment = average marginally attached rate for last year according to BLS reports
incentive_rate = unemployment * 7 + underemployment * 3 + marginal_attachment * 2
your_incentive = job_creation_ability * incentive_rate
please send a cashiers check in the amount of your_incentive to the US Treasury.
Now we know that some will criticize this bold incentive and synergy actualization effort.
Those who don't believe in the greatness of America's job creator's will be chief among the negativizers.
Let us not squander the opportunity for America's job creator's to be freed from the burden of normal income taxes. Under this plan, a successful job creator will drive employment higher and be financially rewarded for his efforts.
Other American hating factions will try to use complicated math and past statistics to destroy the moral fiber of this country and undermine the greatness of this incentive plan.
Those treasonous individuals may say things like:
In October 2009, using this formula, the incentive rate would be 92.6% and would be applied to all income.
You can be sure that these liberal fanatics are using math to force you to look backwards rather than forwards to greatness.
Or they may say:
Currently, the incentive rate would be 77.2% and would apply to every dollar earned, and even applied to unrealized gains in investment and retirement accounts.
Again with the backwards looking and consistent undermining of our country's job creators to actualize the dream of our fathers.
These liberal traitors are using facts and figures designed to destroy America's god fearing youth rather than incentives guaranteed to restore America's greatness.
Or the ultimate insult:
The incentive rate could go above 100% forcing the wealthy in our country to surrender more than they earned.
To which I say: "Well that's a damn fine incentive. Isn't it?"