I've had a moment of an epiphany recently. Such things come with great upheaval in ones life. They come when moments of reality come bearing down on you like a freight train. Now this freight train is not without welcome. It came as a happy surprise and today is a day of joy.
What joy do I speak of, and what is this epiphany I've had.
Saoirse Ivy was born today at 6:15am. Mom went into labor way early into the morning around 3am. We arrived at the hospital shortly after and a few short hours later she literally came barreling out like a cannon ball.
No seriously.
Mom was scheduled for an epidural and literally during the procedure screamed "Ohh my god she's coming out right now!". Fifteen minutes later, viola we are the proud parents of a new baby girl.
The gravity of it all has only just recently hit some many hours later. You see about a few hours before mom was set to go into labor, I was still awake. I suffer insomnia so I literally went to bed shortly after midnight. So there I was with my wife egging me on to the hospital while I drank stale coffee and slapped myself in the face to prep myself for the drive over. So at the end of this long day only just recently have I had a moment to reflect.
I sit on my couch while mom and baby rest peacefully at the hospital. It sounds cruel I know, but my son just started school and I am tasked with ensuring he boards the bus and maintains his schedule. So it is here I sit, sorta with a half baked brain and weary nerves while watching a classic I love, Memphis Belle...great movie btw a must watch if you have not seen it. Its while I am sitting here mulling over the implications of our new addition that I had an epiphany.
I have skin in the game now. Not my skin mind you, but skin that I am tasked with protecting and ensuring the future for.
Sure I had somewhat the same feeling when my son Ronan was born, but it was different. I don't know how to describe it or even translate it to word, however the feeling is very distinct. Perhaps maybe the difference in relations between a father and daughter is the reason, to be honest I have no idea.
But as the diary title points out, now that I have a daughter. This war on women that the extremists in this nation wage now seems personal. It may seem perhaps a little over the top for some, but for me, I think I truly get it. The gravitas of the attacks are now that much more real and all together much more personal.
Having seen her beautiful face and eyes, envisioning of her future, it is only having physically seen them that I can see the stark difference of what one side wants and what the other wants to prevent. I see it as black and white as the pieces on an Othello board. I, also like that wonderful strategic game, see the moves more clearly now that one side plays to disenfranchise one over the other.
I get long winded and its getting late, but like I wrote before here...I get it. And now after this morning, It's been seared into my head like the char marks on a well done steak. Almost like the congratulatory steak the hospital complimentary served to mom and myself tonight. But what of my future actions?
So as I said, what now?
It's personal and I'll be damned if any crazy extremist is going to detrimentally affect my daughters future. And you can be damned hell or high water I will move the mountains if necessary to ensure her future and the future of all women.
It's really put the cherry on top of why its so important we get the vote out this year. Why we must get the Dems back in control of the reigns of this nation, and why our current sitting President must hold office. It's also emphasized why we must fight hard locally to take back our school boards, take back our common councils, and take back our state houses.
We need a wave, and that tsunami needs to be blue. Do what you can, when you can, and as often as you can.
I might be up for the next few hours, so responses will be for a bit. But you know I got a kid to put on a bus tomorrow and a warrior woman momma to check up on in the morning.
For those curious, here is the brand new bundle of joy. Fresh picture from momma tonight.
Mon Aug 20, 2012 at 9:06 AM PT: Came home from hospital to get some things together and wait to pick my son up from the bus and wow, spotlight. Thank you rangers and thank you all for the well wishes. Wanted to quick update since I won't be able to respond to all because well...obvious reasons :)
Mon Aug 20, 2012 at 6:23 PM PT: Oly Ole Wow, came home from the hospital today and after getting my son to bed and ready for school tomorrow figured I'd catch up and try to comment on the comments from yesterday.
Thanks for the wrecking ball listing. I want to reply to everyone, I Just lack the time. So really thank you all for the well wishes. Those that might be confused as the pronunciation of the name the phonetic spelling is 'SEER-shə' and is the Irish word for freedom, and picked it for that reason....and it also helps I'm about as Irish as they come. Well what parts of me aren't Irish are Irish folks who moved to Scotland. Same reason we picked Ronan for our son.
I'd upload some more pics, but my phone is acting like a toddler right now. If I can get it figured out, they'll be up tonight.
Thanks again everyone for the well wishes. Mom and daughter come home tomorrow finally!