There is no red America, there is no blue America, there is only the America that can't believe how bad this guy did in the debate! How bad was the defeat? Obama lost despite Mitt Romney doing this.
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): I'm sorry, Jim, I'm going to stop the subsidy to PBS. I'm going to stop other things. I like PBS, I love Big Bird. Actually like you, too. But I'm not going to — I'm not going to keep on spending money on things to borrow money from China to pay for.
Motherfucker fired Big Bird!! (audience laughter and applause) America's favorite non-fried bird! Motherfucker fired Big Bird and won! Beloved children's character Big Bird, and the sad truth is Romney could've waterboarded Aladdin, put down Blue, deported Dora the Explorer and still won walking away!
....
Here's what's perhaps most maddening. For the past year and a half, you, Mr. President, have inundated this country with urgent e-mails, begging for support, and money, and energy, and money, and money, and money.
And it's not just the number of e-mails, it's the intensity of their content. "This Is Our One Shot". "Say You're In". "Your Response Is Critical". "I Can't Do This On My Own". And by the way, you made that abundantly clear last night!
But the point is this. You and your campaign have demanded a level of effort, urgency, and relentlessness from your supporters. A level of effort, urgency, and relentlessness you failed to display in a national presidential debate. Shouldn't your urgency and passion be on par with the urgency and passion of your e-blasts? Or are you not on your mailing lists?
I'm tempted to leave you with the wise words of a noted actor, whose campaign viral video has been forwarded to my inbox 1,900 times by some of your more passionate followers. I believe it goes a little something like this.
SAMUEL L. JACKSON (9/27/2012): Wake the fuck up.
All right, we all know this is a deeply divided nation, or at least it was until last night, when something happened that brought all Americans together in agreement.
SUZANNE MALVEAUX (10/3/2012): President Obama took a shellacking.
ED SCHULTZ (10/3/2012): He was not properly prepared for this!
JAMES CARVILLE (10/3/2012): The President didn't bring his A game.
JOE KLEIN (10/4/2012): He was just so dull.
AUSTAN GOOLESBEE (10/4/2012): He looked tired to me.
STUART VARNEY (10/4/2012): Romney won hands down.
ANN COULTER (10/4/2012): He was very, very bad last night.
There is no red America, there is no blue America, there is only the America that can't believe how bad this guy did in the debate! How bad was the defeat? Obama lost despite Mitt Romney doing this.
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): I'm sorry, Jim, I'm going to stop the subsidy to PBS. I'm going to stop other things. I like PBS, I love Big Bird. Actually like you, too. But I'm not going to — I'm not going to keep on spending money on things to borrow money from China to pay for.
Motherfucker fired Big Bird!! (audience laughter and applause) America's favorite non-fried bird! Motherfucker fired Big Bird and won! Beloved children's character Big Bird, and the sad truth is Romney could've waterboarded Aladdin, put down Blue, deported Dora the Explorer and still won walking away!
Romney won with the sound up.
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): You're entitled as President to your own airplane and to your own house, but not to your own facts.
Romney won with the sound off.
Dude, he's yelling at you! Look up! Look up! What are you looking at? What are you writing that's so important? What are you doing?
Oh, that's nice. That is impressive work. I didn't realize that. Maybe you could give that to Mitt Romney as a souvenir of the night he crushed you in that debate.
And here's the thing. Obama lost even though Romney was lying his ass off the entire night!
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): On Medicare, for current retirees, he's cutting $716 billion dollars from the program.
He's not cutting $716 billion from the program! He's negotiating lower payment formulas to providers and insurance companies, aka, the exact same thing that's in Paul Ryan's budget plan!
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): You put $90 billion dollars into green jobs ... and these businesses, many of them have gone out of business, I think about half of them, of the ones that have been invested in have gone out of business.
Well, almost half. Out of nearly three dozen, three of them have gone out. So that's almost half, except, aka, nowhere fucking near half!
MITT ROMNEY (10/3/2012): The President said he'd cut the deficit in half. Unfortunately, he doubled it.
It went down! It went from $1.2 trillion when he took office to $1.1 trillion now! Mr. President, are you just going to let him roll you?
10/3/2012:
JIM LEHRER: Mr. President, two minutes.
BARACK OBAMA: When I walked in the Oval Office, I had more than a trillion dollar deficit greeting me. And we know where it came from. ... We had to take some initial emergency measures to make sure we didn't slip into a Great Depression. ... Let's make sure that we are cutting out those things that are not helping us grow. ... 18 government programs for education that were well-intentioned ... medical fraud in Medicare and Medicaid ... Republicans to cut a trillion dollars out of our discretionary domestic budget. ... A specific $4 trillion dollar deficit reduction plan. It's on our website. You can look at all the numbers. ... Let me just finish this point, because you're looking for contrast.
JIM LEHRER: Way over the two minutes.
BARACK OBAMA: Sorry.
You went over your time?? And yet somehow managed in all that overtime to not turn and look your opponent in the eye and just mention what he said was untrue? Not even a quick sneeze before your answer, not even a quick "Bullshit"? No need to be coy? Let me see if I can come up with a 2-minute answer that might have been more effective.
"LLLLIIIIIIIIIIAAAAARRRRRR!!!! LIE LIE LIAR LIE LIE LIAR LIE! LIE LIE LIE LIAR! LIE ROMNEY LIE! ROMNEY LIE-A-LIE!" "Your time is up." "Shut your fat pie-hole, Lehrer! I'm the Commander-In-Chief. I don't take orders from Totebag Johnny. LIE LIE LIE!!"
What'd you think, Lehrer was going to bail you out, hold Romney's feet to the fire? Lehrer spent the night trying to figure out who was who.
JIM LEHRER (10/3/2012): What are the differences between the two of you as to how you would go about tackling the deficit? ... Do you believe there's a fundamental difference between the two of you as to how you view the mission of the federal government? ... Do you see a major difference between the two of you on Social Security? ... What is the difference? ... Let's move to health care, where I know there is a clear difference.
"You're both around the same height. Is there a difference in your weights? Is there? I see energy-wise, there's a difference. This gentleman here appears to be on Ambien, and the other gentleman appears to have tried caffeine for the first time in his life. Have you guys noticed that too?"
Seriously, it's like minutes before the debate, Scott Bakula Quantum Leaped into ehrere's body, and then had to figure out where the fuck he was. "All right, two people on stage, there's an audience, uh... what's the difference between them?" And then Bakula's like, "Hey Dean Stockwell, am I here to prevent a crime, or what the hell's going on around here? Anyway, my point is, Quantum Leap is a really good show.
Anyway, here's the saddest part. Despite Romney's best effort at lying, the only category Obama defeated Romney in was biggest lie of the night.
10/3/2012:
JIM LEHRER: I'm not going to grade the two of you and say your answers have been too long or I've done a poor job.
BARACK OBAMA: You've done a great job.
(shakes head)
Look, I don't get this. I honestly don't get this. Mr. President, you seem to either be annoyed to be there, or reluctant to make your case. Because I'm assuming you have a case, which would be a whole other issue. You know, I hate to do this to you, sir. Camera 3, please.
Hi, Mr. President. You know, look. I know you probably dread having to spend 90 minutes debating some knucklehead from Harvard who's just going to rrr rrr rrr rrr rrr all night. Believe me, I know. I've been there. Or... will be Saturday at 8. (wild audience cheering) No camera on in the green room, right?
But you know, Mr. President, everyone has parts of their jobs that they don't like as much. But they still have to do those things if they want to keep those jobs. And if you don't want to do it for yourself, think of your supporters. Look what your performance did last night to one of them.
CHRIS MATTHEWS (10/3/2012): I don't know what he was doing out there. ... I don't know how he let Romney get away with the crap he threw out. ... What was he doing tonight? He went in there disarmed! ... Where was Obama tonight?
You happy? Mr. President, you broke Chris Matthews! Now nobody can use him! Now, admittedly, Matthews not a complex machine, everyone knows he's just a simple potato battery, but still! He likes you!
And even the people who don't like you were somewhat stunned at the poor performance. Even Osama bin Laden, from the bottom of his watery grave, watched, and was like, "That's the guy that killed me?"
"Really? Mr. Look Down at the Paper All Night shot me in the face?"
Here's what's perhaps most maddening. For the past year and a half, you, Mr. President, have inundated this country with urgent e-mails, begging for support, and money, and energy, and money, and money, and money.
And it's not just the number of e-mails, it's the intensity of their content. "This Is Our One Shot". "Say You're In". "Your Response Is Critical". "I Can't Do This On My Own". And by the way, you made that abundantly clear last night!
But the point is this. You and your campaign have demanded a level of effort, urgency, and relentlessness from your supporters. A level of effort, urgency, and relentlessness you failed to display in a national presidential debate. Shouldn't your urgency and passion be on par with the urgency and passion of your e-blasts? Or are you not on your mailing lists?
I'm tempted to leave you with the wise words of a noted actor, whose campaign viral video has been forwarded to my inbox 1,900 times by some of your more passionate followers. I believe it goes a little something like this.
SAMUEL L. JACKSON (9/27/2012): Wake the fuck up.
We'll be right back.
for how Obama campaign surrogates tried to spin that debate performance.
his positions away.
.