As I’ve mentioned before, I tend to be someone who recalls anniversaries (sometimes to my detriment). Somehow I almost let this one slip by without notice: the first year of MNCC. Congratulations to us!
Our first diary in the series went up on 10/3/11, one that I wrote devoted to the topic of how to choose one’s oncologist. The diary generated some good ideas for me (and presumably anyone else who read it) and attracted some commenters who have turned out to be MNCC regulars, to my great delight and satisfaction. Regarding that first query: it turns out that I have stayed with my original gyn-onc, and one year farther along in my treatment we seem more at ease with each other. It certainly helps that my condition has dramatically improved! And it also helps me that I have become far more proactive about my own health care—with equal weight on both words—than ever before.
That’s probably the first of the major lessons that I have had reinforced from hosting the MNCC for this year, namely how critical it is to be the one in charge of one’s healing. I rely heavily on the expertise of all my health care practitioners, and still it is ultimately up to me to make the decisions about what is working for me, and what is not. I think we’ve done a marvelous job here of encouraging each other to take control of one’s own care and recovery.
The second major lesson that I have learned repeatedly here is that the MNCC people are here for each other. I mean this in part quite selfishly, because over and over again I have been blessed by the regular, sincere, and thoughtful support of the diarists and commenters during this past year. Since I am someone who does not score terribly high on measures of trust, this entire experience has been heart-healing for me in a way I could not have anticipated. But of course I’ve also seen this tenderness and compassion directed toward many, many others besides me who are part of these threads. That makes me happy too.
Please join me over the jump for a few more words about the “greatest hits” of our first year.
I must begin by thanking my sister and brother diarists during this past year. ZenTrainer, she of the many dogs and cats and indefatigable humour, has become a wonderful friend and colleague of mine; I am honored that she agreed to be co-administrator of the group with me. We are all lucky to have her diaries (4 for us so far), and I hope she’ll keep them coming regularly. DrLori, whose reputation on the site was established long before I showed up, has been another generous diarist and commenter, ready to pitch in regardless of her ongoing, demanding treatment regime. Last week was her 4th diary, and I also look forward to her next one. Many, many thanks to these two diarists in particular.
Four other diarists contributed two each during the year: farmerchuck, murasaki, ProvokingMeaning (thanks, hon!), and DarkHawk98. Every one of their diaries was distinctive and personal, bringing valuable perspectives on the topics they discussed into our “club” for fruitful discussion. The series would be much diminished without their diaries and comments.
Eight more diarists contributed one each: Lorikeet, ramara, hazey, Susan from 29, Betty Pinson, bcdelta, smileycreek, and Carol in San Antonio. A mix of veteran diarists and newbies, these diarists also contributed greatly to the substance of our series this year. It has been my privilege to have them choose to grace the MNCC with their effort and presence; I thank and salute you all.
And, of course, I hope that the presence of other diarists in the MNCC continues, even grows. Over the year’s time, I contributed only a little over half of the diaries in the series, and I think we are all the better served by having such a good range of participation. So please do consider writing one some Monday soon, whether you have or haven’t already. It’s a really good place to hang out.
One more important piece of information before I forget. It’s easy to find all the MNCC diaries, if you want to see one or more of them. Just follow this link and you’ll find the entire list, including those not part of the “official” Monday Night series but relevant enough to be republished to the group.
It’s actually this group of diaries I’d like to discuss next. I am very grateful for the side conversations, in a sense, that have enhanced the MNCC during this year—that is, the diaries that were not originally part of the series, but were republished to the group by one alert editor or another.
We might not have caught all of these diaries, though I think we’ve done pretty well. Clearly, cancer is something that affects more and more of us every day, and various Kossacks have written with great passion and clarity about their “encounter with the diagnosis” (in ZenTrainer's phrase, iirc). Some of those diaries have stemmed from their own or a loved one’s personal experience, while others have been written by people making the connections between cancer and some of the other major political issues in our society (especially the Komen debacle and poverty and access to health care).
There are two more categories of diaries I’d like to mention specially. One is the Community Quilt series, the ministry of Sara R and her sister winglion. For the past year, according to my calculations, the original quilt sisters have prepared a quilt for a person with cancer (and/or a caregiver) at a rate of just under one per month. If republishing to MNCC gets another message for each of these quilts, then we are also making an important contribution to the health and well-being of the community at large. As a recipient of one of these life-affirming quilts myself, I cannot thank Sara and Ann enough for their love and work.
The other group deserving special mention is that of the obituary or memorial diaries. In the past year, the MNCC has lost two of our own—shadowplayer and alliedoc—who were remembered in the regular series. (Although he was a MNCC member too, ulookarmless’s beautiful remembrance was written by KelleyRN2 to appear initially in KosAbility.) Leftcenterlibertarian had the kindness to let the community know when his mother, Granny Doc, had died; that diary permitted Kossacks one last opportunity to express how much they had admired and enjoyed her writing. Several other diarists posted compelling, heart-rending accounts about the loss of someone dear to them through cancer, some recent and others much more remote in time and place, and it was a privilege to bear witness to their grief along with them. Notably, Otteray Scribe, no stranger to loss and sadness, wrote exquisitely about his beloved grandson, Reed, and his valiant but vain struggle to survive to adulthood. Would that all those we mourn had been able to recover from their affliction, but it was not to be.
We have all read, written, and shared a lot during this past year, and what we have built together deserves celebration. I hope that I have managed here to convey some reasonable portion of my gratitude for your presence in this series. If not, let me try again: thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Now, however, I have two questions to pose to you for the evening:
1. What have you appreciated about the MNCC to date?
2. What topics would you like to see addressed? (and are you willing to write about them yourself? ;)
Peace and blessings as always, my dear Kossack friends. If I were counting the positive developments I have experienced since my diagnosis of cancer, getting to know you would be close to the top of that list. Along with my chemo curls, of course :P
Monday Night Cancer Club is a Daily Kos group focused on dealing with cancer, primarily for cancer survivors and caregivers, though clinicians, researchers, and others with a special interest are also welcome. Volunteer diarists post Monday evenings between 7-8 PM ET on topics related to living with cancer, which is very broadly defined to include physical, spiritual, emotional and cognitive aspects. Mindful of the controversies endemic to cancer prevention and treatment, we ask that both diarists and commenters keep an open mind regarding strategies for surviving cancer, whether based in traditional, Eastern, Western, allopathic or other medical practices. This is a club no one wants to join, in truth, and compassion will help us make it through the challenge together.