Four
More
Years.
"This one."
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Note: Vote! And take your smartphone with you to record shenanigans.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Election Day 2016: 1,463
Days 'til the Found Footage Festival at the legendary Drexel Theatre in Columbus, Ohio: 11
Number of Obama field offices in Ohio: 137
Number of Romney field offices in Ohio: 40
(Source: MSNBC)
Number of Obama campaign rallies this year: 101
(Source: Mark Knoller)
Final electoral vote tally for Obama and Romney, respectively, in the VOTES Project election, with participation by over 54,000 high school students from 130 schools in 47 states (due to Sandy, schools in NY/NJ/PA couldn't vote, thus the 524 total): 316 / 208
C&J's official electoral vote prediction for Obama/Romney: 316 / 222
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Tuesday Words of Wisdom from the Right-wing Blogosphere:
I've been saying it for months now, LANDSLIDE against The Butcher of Benghazi of Reaganesque proportions.
---Commenter Gunng200 at RedState
All together now: 1…2…3…
Classy!
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Puppy Pic of the Day: "I prithee, willst thou cast thy vote for my yooman this fine day? I thanketh thee, truly."
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Aaaaaand...
They're off!!!
CHEERS to the official starting gun. The fine folks in Dixville Notch, New Hampshire (motto: "A notch above Hicksville and
proud of it!") and Hart's location (motto: "I found Hart! He's over here!") have the honor of being the first voters in the nation to cast their ballots. The former saw a 5-5 O-R tie, and the latter saw a 23-9 Obama blowout.
Final tally between the two locations: Obama wins in a 28-14 Granite State LANDSLIDE!!! Oh, and just for the record, there was one write-in vote by Old Man McGinley, who as usual voted for McKinley because "It rhymes, sonny. Hee hee hee hic!"
CHEERS to the rights stuff. Kossack JamesGG speak...you listen:
866-OUR-VOTE is Election Protection's hotline for voting rights. It's already being staffed by trained volunteers in an office here in DC; tomorrow, small armies of trained volunteers will descend upon call centers across the country, ready to answer any questions or handle any problem with the voting process.
Election protection: 1-866-OUR-VOTE (1-866-687-8683)
Spanish Version: 888-VE-Y-VOTA (1-888-839-8682)
Both of those numbers are toll-free, and there's other valuable info in JamesGG's post. If you find yourself in a situation at the polls where you feel like you're being pressured or otherwise bamboozled, don’t go kickin' anyone in the shins...call the above numbers. And then call me so I can come kick 'em in the shins. Have steel toes, will travel.
CHEERS to 4 EVs 4 4 more years! The Maine Sunday Telegram published early-voting numbers for our state yesterday, and I refuse to share them with you. Heh heh, I keeed...
If early-voting numbers reflect the political parties' enthusiasm, then Maine Democrats are more energized about this election than their Republican rivals. ... As of [last] Monday, registered Democrats had returned 42 percent of the total of 112,322 accepted absentee ballots in Maine, compared with 28 percent by registered Republicans and 27 percent by unenrolled voters. … In Maine, the Democratic Party has long held the advantage in early voting, an edge the party attributes to its door-to-door activism.
And, sticking with tradition, I hereby issue my challenge to all of you in the rest of the country: I believe Maine's final turnout---the percent of voters who turn out, that is---will kick all 'o your asses. For perspective, we turned out 74% in 2004 and 72% in 2008. Go ahead...top that! We. Dare. You. The state with the highest voter turnout gets a $5 million donation by Donald Trump to the charity of President Obama's choice assuming it coincides with the release of the President's college records and passport application. Because we put other people's money where our mouth is, bub.
JEERS to Darth Vader's apprentice, Darth Paul. Planning to blow off your right to vote? Think it doesn't count for much? Well, lemme give you a preview of what's in store if enough butt sitters sit on their butts today:
Paul Ryan after his first term as VP.
Representative Paul D. Ryan may have largely disappeared from the national spotlight down the campaign homestretch, ceding attention to Mitt Romney. But if the Republican ticket prevails, Mr. Ryan plans to come back roaring, establishing an activist vice presidency that he said would look like Dick Cheney’s under President George W. Bush.
Any questions?
CHEERS to the first skinny, gangly president with big ears from Illinois. On November 6, 1860, Abraham Lincoln was elected president. Even back then the party had its flamboyant wing. From Joseph Cummins' book, Anything for a Vote:
In 1860 presidents were still selected
through a game of "Musical Chairs." This
captures the moment of Lincoln's victory
over Stephen Douglas, who stormed out.
The Republicans held massive rallies and marches several miles long, with hordes of Wide Awakes---Republican faithful who would save the Union---marching with torches and likenesses of "Honest Abe." The Wide Awakes wore oilcloth capes and strange black enamel caps to protect themselves from dripping torch oil. In surviving lithographs, they bear a weird resemblance to certain members of the Village People. Boston Republicans organized a rail-splitter's battalion---in homage to Lincoln, every member stood exactly six-feet-four-inches tall. And throughout the campaign, Republican newspapers published countless jokes at [challenger Stephen] Douglas's expense, such as: "Lincoln is like a rail. Douglas is the reverse---rail spelled backwards---liar."
But Republicans got their share of guff, too, as when the
New York Herald wrote: "The conduct of the Republican party in this nomination is a remarkable indication of a small intellect growing smaller." The words were wrong as applied to Lincoln...but, as it turns out, spot-on as applied to his party.
P.S. It's also the 124th anniversary of the day in 1888 when Republican Benjamin Harrison beat Grover Cleveland to become our 23rd president. Funny thing...Cleveland came back four years later and kicked Harrison's ass. What's that dish that's best served cold, again?
CHEERS to the third person on the Democratic ticket. I can't even begin to rave about how much Michelle Obama has exceeded my high expectations of her as First Lady. From the awesome kitchen garden to doing push-ups with any host who dares challenge her (and her killer delts)…to her work on veterans' issues and kids' health issues…to making the White House more accessible to the public than I can remember and just her amazing all-American role-model Mom'ness, I will gush about her from dawn to dusk if you let me. Michelle Obama = teh awesome. And she's sweet on us a bit, too. Most of you got this in your email box yesterday, but I'm preserving it in the time capsule:
Four more years of Michelle!!!
I didn't want this to get lost in the excitement of everything that will happen [Tuesday], so I wanted to take a moment, right now, to say two simple words that I cannot say enough to all of you who have traveled this journey with us: Thank you.
Thank you for the kindness, warmth, and love that you have shown me, Barack, and especially our girls---your support and your prayers mean the world to us. Thank you for the hard work and energy and passion that you have poured into this campaign---from all those hours knocking on doors and making calls to all those times you dug a little deeper and gave what you could when it was needed the most.
Tweren't nothin', ma'am. Now drop and give us twenty.
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Four years ago in C&J: November 6, 2008
Senator Guttersnipe
CHEERS to "That guttersnipe Al Franken." That's Bill O'Reilly's latest term of endearment for the guy who stands a good chance of beating Senator Norm Coleman in Minnesota. The vote total is so close that
a recount is being done later this month. Please understand how critical it is for Franken to win. It'll extend our majority in the Senate to 58, but more importantly it'll send O'Reilly over the edge. I'd buy tickets to see that.
P.S. If you're wondering who #57 is, please say hello to Senator-elect Jeff Merkley from the great state of Oregon. I'd swear he's John Larroquette's brother.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to the final final final appeal. If you love Will Farrell, you'll love watching him promise to do unspeakable things to himself in exchange for your vote. If you hate Will Farrell, you'll love watching him promise to do unspeakable things to himself in exchange for your vote. So I guess that makes him the Great Unifier:
And one final word of advice as we wait for the polls to close in 82 gazillion hours: RELAX!!!!!!!!!!! Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
"If you think right now I give a damn about Cheers and Jeers, then you don't know me."
---Gov. Chris Christie
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