Skip to main content

I should start by informing you that some of this post involves swearing.

Over the last few days I have decided to write a little bit on my neuroscience and physiology study breaks. In Minnesota, my home state, there is an attempt to make gay marriage more illegal than it already is with a constitutional amendment.

A little bit about me before we continue. I do not look like the typical liberal. Being a 270 lb. powerlifter with a shaved head and goatee, I probably look more like a conservative than a liberal. I try to embody the fact that people of real strength support the downtrodden and the vulnerable.

Below the fold are four writings (three parts and the final appeal) I have posted to my Facebook account in an attempt to change the mind of some of my friends. You are welcome to share them if you'd like. However, please let people know where you found it (the DailyKos, and me too, I suppose!).

Update: This post is specific to the Minnesota marriage amendment.
In Washington, voting yes affirms the right to marry.
Thank you to notrouble, who pointed this out to me.

Why vote no? Part 1: The argument in favor of minding your own fucking business.

I don't like the idea of government or more precisely, extremist religion under the guise of government telling me who people I care about can and cannot marry. The kind of family my friends want to have is none of my business and none of your business as long as they are not abusing anyone. Vote no.

When was the last time someone complained about your divorce? Maybe the fact that you had premarital sex? Did someone look under your pillow and look for the lady magazine or the plastic boyfriend? Oh, that's right! It is none of anyone's business but yours. Mind your own business and vote no. Alternately, leave it blank and stay out of an issue that has nothing to do with you at all.

Are you planning on getting married to a person of the same sex? If not, stay out of it. Mind your own fucking business. Vote no.

Don't prevent dear friends of mine from expressing their life long love for each other. Vote no.

Why vote no? Part 2: The moral argument.

It is fair to say that morality can be broadly defined as the desire to reduce suffering in the world. Actions that increase suffering can be defined as immoral. On the other hand, things that decrease suffering can be considered to have the moral high ground.

One might ask, how does this apply to two women getting married? The only measurable suffering to occur as a result of homosexual matrimony could result from people being temporarily uncomfortable with the normalization of actions that are currently taboo in American society. This demonstrates that there are not many reasonable moral arguments in favor of constitution prohibition being defined in the marriage amendment.

Contrast this with what the current situation is. Currently gay couples are not given the rights given to married couples. If a close friend of mine is seriously injured or has a severe medical problem, his partner does not have access to him in the hospital if he is in critical condition. Keep in mind that the people I am talking about have been together for over 15 years.

Situations like this dramatically and unnecessarily increases the suffering of people every day. The family (parents) of the patient gets to decide hospital visitation, and that is not right.

Are you in favor of needless suffering? If so, vote yes. If not, vote no.

Voting yes is the immoral position. Vote no on the immoral marriage prohibition amendment.

Why vote no? Part 3: Be the adult in the room.

It is pretty common to see children complaining about the activity of other people. Typically you will find a child whining about a noise that his or her sibling is making. What is the response that the reasonable parent might give? Oftentimes they might say something along the lines of, "Ignore your brother/sister, go do something worthwhile."

This behavior has manifested itself in in adults who are attempting to prevent consenting adults from making private choices.

The reaction to the possibility of gay people getting married has been immature at best, and despicable at worst (see part 2: the morale argument). People with too much time on their hands are whining relentlessly about what other people are doing. It is time for them to take the advice of parents everywhere. They should do something worthwhile and vote no.

You are not going to agree with everyone you meet in the world. Does that mean that you should spend a significant portion of your free time trying to keep them from being happy? I don't think so. Perhaps that time would be better spent doing something to improve the human condition.

The mark of a mature adult is the ability to understand that not everyone agrees with you, to disagree agreeably. It is a fact of life that you can't like everything everyone does.

Immature adults try to stop people from doing things that they are uncomfortable with. Mature adults will simply turn away and realize gay marriage isn't anything to be concerned with since it doesn't direct affect them. Be one of the adults in the room and vote no.

The appeal.

To all of my dear friends and loved ones,

Out of all of things I have felt strongly enough about to share with my friends as of late, this is the most important. Some of my friends have been reading and commenting on my recent posts, and I appreciate that. If I have swayed any opinions in favor of love, even better. I value your opinion of me, and I hope you feel the same as well.

I don't often reflect on the kind of friend I am, but I think I am going to make an attempt right now. Often I go out of my way to help those that I care about if I am able to. Perhaps someone hurt thier back, wants to get stronger, or wants to lose a few pounds. Maybe someone is having relationship problems, or maybe they need a few dollars to help them get to their next paycheck. Maybe I passed your the name of someone hiring, or gave your contact information to an employer.

Asking for anything in return is not in my nature, but I am going to make an exception today. If you have been reading my posts, you will know where I'm going with this. The time for debating and discussing is over. It is no longer the time to draw contrasts, refute and dispute arguments. In just under twelve hours we have an opportunity. "An opportunity to do what?" one might ask.

Tomorrow we have the opportunity to put fear and division behind us. We can say no to those who would distract us with social issues while destroying the world we live in. The wedge of social issues has damaged this country long enough, and it is time to say we are through with it.

As a personal favor to me, I am asking you to vote no tomorrow on both amendments. I would like you to choose love over anger or discomfort or what your pastor is saying.

While I'm not a religious person, I have read, heard and watched religious people make the claim that their religion has a foundation build with love. I am asking you to prove it tomorrow. When you are alone in the voting booth, I am asking you to think for a moment. Ask yourself, "Do I really want to prevent people who love each other from having a family?"

Once the question is posed, fill in the bubble that history will celebrate. Allow my gay and lesbian friends that I care about to be filled with love. Fill the bubble for social progress. Fill in the wedge of social issues that has divided our hurting country for far too long. Fill the world with love. Fill the bubble that says No to the marriage amendment tomorrow.

Your friend,


Those were the arguments I made. I hope that this can be shared to help others, or I hope that it at least helped you feel good.

6:43 PM PT: This post is specific to the Minnesota marriage amendment.

In Washington, voting yes affirms the right to marry.

Thank you to notrouble, who pointed this out to me.

Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags


More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site