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Thank the lord for President Obama's victory. It means so much to me. Now I can quit my job and go on the dole like i've always wanted to. It's been hard having to work for the last 30 years so I can't wait to get unemployment again. Unfortunately I'm stuck with my white skin but I heard now with Obama as president I can get an honorary birth certificate from Kenya that'll be good for Harvard. I'm taking up Spanish in the mean time. If you're Latino in New America you get extra food stamps that's good for beer. (Yes, we're going to change the country's name) Once they let me in the "club" they are going to reveal how they commit voter fraud but I'm sworn to secrecy. So all of my fellow white people please don't give me up. I'm just trying to pass. The chains we put on you will only let us live for free. I love my L shaped room. When do we get our stuff?

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