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From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…

Oh! More Things I Know:

President Barack Obama bends over so the son of a White House staff member can pat his head during a family visit to the Oval Office May 8, 2009. The youngster wanted to see if the President's haircut felt like his own. (Official White House Photo by Pete
One of White House photographer
Pete Souza's unforgettable images.
There is no sound more pathetic than that of a Sunday show roundtable of beltway pundits laughing uproariously at a "funny" quip that's not funny.

When it comes out in 2017, Pete Souza's coffee table book featuring only his best photos of the Obama presidency will be roughly ten feet thick.

I'm so old I remember when President Obama was going to lose the election because he made a joke about Boston trading Kevin Youkilis to the White Sox.

The number of issues I "must pay immediate attention to and take action on right now," based on a week's worth of emails from advocacy groups, stands at 127.

You know an election is over when "(not-)collectible" outfits come out with their cheesy TV ads for "Victory Dollar" coins voiced by an announcer who sounds like he's got a bunch of 'em in his mouth.

Rush Limbaugh complains that GOP consultants "get rich no matter who wins or who loses." Yeah...just like Rush Limbaugh gets rich no matter who wins or who loses.

One right-wing prediction I hope comes true: that President Obama ends up replacing at least two conservative Supreme Court justices with liberal ones.

Steven Spielberg's Lincoln pays painstaking attention to detail, right down to the pauses in our 16th president's famous "A House Divided Gangnam Style" speech.

To piss off the Fox News junkie across the street, the twinkly lights in our living room window spell out SURRENDER, CHRISTMAS!

The best part of last week's Cowboys loss to [whatever team they were playing, I forget] was knowing that George W. Bush was there to watch it happen.

Half of a liberal's time is spent waiting for conservatives to catch up.

Today a bunch of people will die from the affects of alcohol. Today no one will die from the effects of marijuana.

Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]

Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, November 29, 2012

Note: Dog farts are worse, overall.  But, man, do cat farts have staying power.  Film at 11.

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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Chanukah (and Chanukah on the Ellipse in D.C.): 10
Days 'til the O.C. Brew Ho Ho Holiday Ale Festival in Anaheim: 9
Estimated number of Irish women who travel to England per year to get an abortion, because the procedure is banned in Ireland: 4,000
Year abortion became legal in England: 1967
(Source: USA Today)
Percentage of respondents to a Quinnipiac University poll who “believe we are experiencing large storms such as Sandy and Irene more frequently as a result of climate change”: 78%
Number of utility workers from 30 states and Canada who came to New York to assist Consolidated Edison in returning power to the city: 57,000
(Source: Time)
Population of Greenland: 57,000

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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:

Pat Robertson appearing to flip the bird
A sign from God to
this guy's viewers?
Quite a few people have been mishearing the Lord lately. The Rev. Pat Robertson thinks the Lord told the people of Dover, Pa., they shouldn't ask for His help anymore because they elected a school board Robertson doesn't like. And Rep. Richard Baker of Louisiana said right after Hurricane Katrina that "we finally cleaned up public housing in New Orleans. We couldn't do it, but God did it."

I kind of doubt Katrina was designed by the Lord as a form of urban renewal. I think it's a big mistake for us to go around putting our own puny interpretations on stuff that happens and then claiming the Lord meant thus-and-such by it. It is my humble opinion that some folks should do a lot more listening to God and a lot less talking for Him.
---December, 2005

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Puppy Pic of the Day: "Uhhh…hi."

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CHEERS to Great Moments in Awkwardness.  Today's C&J birthday poll is a fantasy experiment---heck, half of the "who'd you rather have lunch with" choices are stiff as a board and you couldn’t chat with 'em over sammiches if you tried.  President Obama, on the other hand, will really, truly, actually have lunch today with stiff-as-a-board Mitt Romney.  Writes Jonathan Capehart:

Mitt Romney:
What I don’t expect the president to bring up is Romney’s boneheaded belief that Obama promised “gifts” to minority voters.  Or Romney’s trashing 47 percent of the country.  …  The president is too much of a gentleman to do that.  Forcing Romney to eat crow would serve no purpose but to pour salt on an open wound.  Besides, walking through the White House gates as a visitor rather than the occupant is crow enough.
But I understand there will be bayonet shish kabobs.  And also a salad bar so Mitt can say, "I built that!"  Ya sure did, punky.  Ya sure did.

P.S. I was originally going to say that I'd love to be a fly on the wall during their lunch, but then I remembered that I'd be putting my life at risk.  I'll just wait for David Corn to release the wait staff's secret video, thanks.  

JEERS to a real Maineiac.  Yesterday "sensible moderate" Republican Senator Susan Collins met for 90 minutes with U.N. Ambassador Dr. Susan Rice to get answers about the bullshit Benghazi non-scandal, and emerged with her hair on fire and screaming something about something that happened in Africa nearly 15 years and two administrations ago that has never been brought up before.  Today Republicans will accuse Rice of botching the charge of the Light Brigade, directing Ishtar, marketing New Coke and drawing outside the lines in kindergarten.  Because they're very serious.

CHEERS to famous firsts. On November 29, 1929 Commander Richard Byrd became the first non-bird to fly over the South Pole.  A friend of mine did that, too, until the weed wore off and he realized he was still in his mom's basement.

CHEERS to filiprogress.  The movement to revise Senate rules to force obstruction-happy Republicans to pick their battles a little more carefully is gathering steam.  Among those who are on board include

Graph of filibuster abuse in the U.S. Senate
This has GOT to stop.
…the Alliance for Justice, the Brennan Center for Justice, Common Cause, the Communications Workers of America, the Sierra Club, and the United Auto Workers.  Their renewed efforts come as Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) and a newly re-elected Senate Democratic majority have announced their intention to change Senate rules to make the GOP’s obstruction efforts more transparent, and speed up the pace of legislative business in the upper chamber. … The prospects of successfully weakening the minority’s power in the Senate is much brighter now.
Even the President is speaking up about it, and yesterday Senator Kirsten Gillibrand stopped by Daily Kos to give us an update.  Y'know, I hate to be a killjoy, but I think it's important to remind ourselves that there's  a serious downside to filibuster reform.  Namely, having to listen to Republican senators yammer on.  And on.  And on.  Our side may end up caving more than theirs.

CHEERS to helping kids avoid having kids.  The teen birth rate in this country has come down quite a bit, but it's still way higher than most industrialized countries.  That's why the American Academy of Pediatrics says it makes sense to allow teens to get prescriptions for the Plan B contraception.  And for the anti-real-world fundies whose heads just popped off their body reading that, they recommend super glue.

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Four years ago in C&J: November 29, 2008

CHEERS to running the show.  No question that in a couple months we're going to see an inaugural celebration for the ages.  Up to 4 million people may attend, and even aliens on other planets will be watching (and, no doubt, jumping up and down shouting "Argnark!  Argnark!").  It's possible there may even be a worldwide brownout because so many people will have their TV sets on at the same time.  And guess who's in charge of putting it all together?  Uh huh, that's right---a Mainer:

U.S. President Barack Obama shakes hands with Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts (R) as first lady Michelle Obama (L) and their daughter Malia (C) watch after the Oath of Office during the inauguration ceremony in Washington, January 20, 2009.
The inauguration was awesome until Roberts
screwed it all up. Ever hear of a 3-by-5 card?
Maine native Emmett Beliveau is leading the presidential inauguration committee that's working on the Washington celebration to usher President-elect Barack Obama into office.  Beliveau, 32, recently moved from Chicago, where he served as Obama's director of advance, to Washington, said his father, Augusta lawyer and State House lobbyist Severin Beliveau. ...

The theme of the inauguration is "A New Birth of Freedom," commemorating the 200th anniversary of Abraham Lincoln's birth, according to the Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies.

Outgoing Maine House Speaker Glenn Cummings, D-Portland, said, "It's terrific Emmett is in such a prominent place and so close to the new president," Cummings said. "He's very young and very talented. He's a trusted member of the Obama team."

Using the Sarah Palin principle of expertise by osmosis, that means I am also in charge of the presidential inauguration, for which I am humbled and deeply proud.  Memo to self: update resume.

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And just one more…

CHEERS to the consistency of "Kossack Time."  Yesterday's C&J poll asked, "At what speed has 2012 gone for you?"  It was an encore of a question we asked exactly six years ago.  Here's the breakout for comparison:

Beat The Clock logo
This = Impossible
Very Fast: 56% in 2006, 54% in 2012

Somewhat Fast: 24% in 2006, 25% in 2012

Normal Speed: 9% in 2006, 11% in 2012

Somewhat Slow: 4% 2006, 4% in 2012

Very Slow: 4% in 2006, 3% in 2012

The conclusion to me seems obvious: on any given year, between seven and eight percent of us spend time at the DMV.  Memo to Nate Silver: scooped ya!

Have a nice Thursday.  Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?

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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:

Help Sandra Fluke Combat the War On Bill in Portland Maine
---Think Progress

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Poll

Which November birthday boy/girl would you rather do lunch with?

5%391 votes
11%857 votes
1%129 votes
2%196 votes
23%1817 votes
2%226 votes
4%316 votes
19%1466 votes
3%243 votes
1%97 votes
9%738 votes
8%676 votes
0%44 votes
6%476 votes

| 7681 votes | Vote | Results

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