More notes for what you should do when you lose someone you've lived with for 2/3 of your life. I wasn't sure what to make of the latest meta issues here, but I made an effort to figure it out, because without Daily Kos this past month would have been a LOT worse. Why today? I've had an increasingly difficult time finding things I want to read here, and when I read Cheers and Jeers and decided not to comment because I couldn't find anything that warranted cheers -- yep, this is the depression they talk about.
I'm functioning. I'm getting the laundry done, I'm cooking (I made a beef stew with leeks for the week yesterday morning), I'm running the usual errands, but when I tell a friend at lunch yesterday that I did something because I have to remind myself to leave the house every so often, that says depression. What's actually getting me through this are the diaries I'm committed to writing here -- the Wednesday Top Comments diary and the Thursday Classical Music diary. They get my creative juices flowing sufficiently to carry me over into writing the syllabi for the two courses I'm teaching this spring - The United States since 1865 (or in other words, the next US History series, beginning probably February 8 or 9) and The Social and Cultural History of the United States, which is an entirely new prep for me and since I have less than a month I have to pay attention. If I can get this basic stuff done (If. HA! I have to do this), I hope it shows me I'm still the same teacher I've always been.
And I actually have things to do for the next two weeks. I'm going to a grief and loss workshop the LGBT Center puts on tomorrow, but the only problem there is that it's a) every two weeks and b) I can't go starting the second week in February because of my teaching schedule. Maybe I can get a referral to a workshop that meets on Thursday. And more Kos! Saturday the LA Kossacks, the following weekend the SF Kossacks, one of whom is welcoming me into his home for three nights. I'm still enough the same me that these will work the way they did in October and November. No, I'm not as fragile as some of this makes me sound. Really!
Still no death certificate, and more trampling to death by ducks stuff, as I now have to get Dell to to fix something that's actually their fault. Everything is under warranty (because it's BRAND NEW), but you know how that goes. You're a wonderful group of people. Thank you for indulging me yet again. Needless to say, you're not going to hear TTFN from me any time soon.
8:37 AM PT: As I said last time, each of these is different. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences, and this time I'm LEARNING a lot from you. This is a wonderful community we have here!
9:02 AM PT: Now to get ready for my errands today. Off to the college which makes me change my password every 90 days, because the last time I used the fall 2012 password was 11/15 (I taught an 8 week compressed course), and you know I can't remember it now.